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okay now for our interview with benjamin

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breckheimer i was 18 when i joined and i

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graduated high school

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june 2002 i joined the us army reserves

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in november of 2002 under the delayed

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entry program so i wasn't quite ready to

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commit i wanted to say my goodbyes to my

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family and stuff so i didn't officially

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get to uh basic training until march of

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2003

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i think that was during shock and off

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phase of the war if i remember

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because there was a lot of coverage of

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that going on and a lot of rumors in the

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basic trading mill

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rumors meaning uh i remember one

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distinct rumor going around

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this was at fort benning when i was in

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uh

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lot of your paperwork and stuff a week

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that

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prior to actually going to basic

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training and i remember hearing

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a rumor going around that the entire

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third infantry division

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in iraq got wiped out by mustard gas and

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all this stuff

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um so that was yeah it was pretty scary

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i think they kind of did that

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intentionally to steer the out of

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you in all honesty

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and it worked it worked that was

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terrified

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yeah well we didn't know what he had at

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that point but yeah chemical weapons i

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mean certainly in syria

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um apparently some major chemical

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weapons were used but

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um i don't think in iraq there was ever

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chemical weapons used as far as we know

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right

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as far as we know i mean i'm a big

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believer that i'm sure there was

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chemical weapons around but

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that has yet to be determined yeah what

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what is it that

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oh uh agent orange yeah

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that was not exactly was that kind of a

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chemical weapon

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i think it was i i have to i actually

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need to talk to a couple of my vietnam

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friends because i never really

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dwelved into their stories but yeah i'm

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pretty sure it was actually a chemical

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agent

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so but you know overall as far as the

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iraq war goes

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extremely controversial war obviously

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but as far as u.s casualties i mean it

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was

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very very limited as far as u.s

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casualties

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yeah definitely compared to you know the

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wars from previous years

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this is kind of i this was told to me

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and i actually didn't know it but uh

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this is the longest

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ongoing war in our country's history and

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that's pretty amazing to me because

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that's

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what you talked about the afghan war

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you're talking about

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or uh on terror

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yeah yeah yeah you know it's all how you

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define

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a war i mean we still have troops in

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japan in

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in germany does that mean that world war

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no you make a very good point and i

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think honestly that's where this might

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be headed we might have

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actual basis there for good yeah and

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that's not necessarily a bad thing i

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mean it means it's an

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ally and it means that you know we can

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protect us interests there and

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protect their interests um but

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um so uh

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so you joined soon after or right around

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the time of shock and awe in

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iraq afghanistan war had already

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commenced and

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you know both of those wars we had kind

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of immediate successes in i mean

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the taliban was gone and gone so to

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speak in afghanistan

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you know soon after we invaded and then

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um in iraq you know saddam hussein was

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out

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very quickly due to shock and awe it was

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really the

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what happened next and kind of the

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nation building

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that becomes very difficult yeah

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definitely and

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it's hard to believe that you know our

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presence is going to change things in

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afghanistan i mean they've been

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uh that way for a thousand plus years

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and uh

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i i'd be i'd be a little pissed off if

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someone was coming to my country and

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telling me i had to change

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right but you know i remember the the

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the the stories

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that came out of afghanistan after we

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quickly

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won that battle we'll call it um you

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know but you know girls

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that were could now go to school and i

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think girls weren't even even

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allowed to play the piano and

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you know the taliban was very you know

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it's a very sexist

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uh ideology and

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so it certainly felt like we did some

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serious good there besides

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rooting out al qaeda to whatever extent

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we did that

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but it seemed like we did really some

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good things for

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just the people of afghanistan who had

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been suffering under this

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horrendous talent regime yeah um and

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ever since then we've been trying to get

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things into shape

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to allow us to leave and allow them to

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have

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you know a better government and that's

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really been the struggle and

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now i guess we might be leaving

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permanently

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yeah i uh i have mixed feelings on that

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uh you know

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i wish we'd kind of take care of our own

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country

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mind our own p's and q's for a while and

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let the world sort itself out but that's

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unfortunately not the way things work

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yeah yeah no

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i mean that's foreign policy and that's

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what gets really difficult because you

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know

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even if i'm correct that we did some

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good in afghanistan

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right well there's a hundred places you

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could go do good in

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right afghanistan's not the only country

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that suffers from poverty and

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oppression of minorities or women or

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what have you and

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you know is the us going to take this on

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you know

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protecting national interests as far as

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rooting out al qaeda that certainly

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seems to make sense

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you know hey you're going to come you're

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going to come and fly planes

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into the world trade center and into the

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pentagon

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and get away with it i don't think so

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right so then it's really just a matter

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of defining

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the root cause of the problem i think

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that bush seemed to

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believe that the root cause of the

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problem was kind of these

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dictatorships in in the middle east that

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you know are not giving opportunity to

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young people

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and are teaching very anti-american uh

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thinking and so on and

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he was going to democratize the middle

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east

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and kind of started down down that road

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and you know that's a long expensive

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road if you want to go down that road

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and the problem with the us is you know

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every four years or eight years you get

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a different president and a different

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vision so

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bush may have been committed to that but

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then you know obama comes in

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and doesn't have the same vision and

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poof there goes

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all of the the blood sweat and tears

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right i mean

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that's really what happened i mean

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you know obama pulls out of iraq and

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next thing you know

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isis or or al qaeda in iraq

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you know pops up and then we're back

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there again

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trying to re-win some of the same

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battles that we had won before

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because of this change in policy it's

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not to say one is right or the other but

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that's the problem with america in wars

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is that it's

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the the the leadership changing so often

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right

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yeah yeah definitely four years is well

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you'd think it'd be enough time to fix

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things but in in the long run it's

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really

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not ideal yeah much to be involved

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yeah i mean you still have it going on

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now because he got trump

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saying that he wants to get out and now

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biden's wanting to get out so

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you know every president's always trying

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to reverse what the prior president did

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um because they're from a different

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party and and

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you guys the soldiers out there

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are the ones kind of stuck in the middle

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because that's

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you know i'll never forget watching

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american sniper which i just think is a

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amazing movie an amazing story and you

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know

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when they bring the battles to life like

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that i i forget if it was fallujah

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what was the main battle in that movie

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i'm pretty sure yeah

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yeah and and they're in there and i'm

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just watching

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thinking wow look what these guys went

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through to take over this

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town which i guess is an important city

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in iraq and but

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as i'm watching it i i already know that

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we since

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gave it back that basically isis took

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over the same city that we had fought

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to get because of the change in policy

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of pulling the troops out

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and um you know soldiers can only

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do the job that's given to them and you

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know try to

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keep the politics out of their head i

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guess i don't know what wha what's your

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thoughts on that

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how do you kind of separate one from the

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other

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you know it's funny you bring that up

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because

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you know there's definitely soldiers

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think about politics a lot

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um especially like the little minute

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things that

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are very nitpicky not necessarily

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politics throughout our government but

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just through our

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chain of commands at times and it's uh

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you know all these

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like um what's uh uh

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[Applause]

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you know like not being able to fire

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until fired upon but now you have to do

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three three steps before you can

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actually fire a shot if you're being

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threatened

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rules of engagement rules of engagement

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that's

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it right it's it's just wild how that

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works it's like

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yeah fighting with one hand tied behind

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your back

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exactly and you're fighting ghosts

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essentially you know they hide behind

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kids and their wives and all that stuff

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so

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what was what what was that is that the

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rule i mean

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what's an example of a rule that was

287
00:09:39,350 --> 00:09:37,600
most troublesome for you guys in

288
00:09:41,990 --> 00:09:39,360
afghanistan

289
00:09:43,590 --> 00:09:42,000
that was definitely a troublesome rule

290
00:09:45,430 --> 00:09:43,600
when we were doing a lot of convoys in

291
00:09:47,670 --> 00:09:45,440
afghanistan we'd have

292
00:09:48,829 --> 00:09:47,680
issues with vehicles that were pretty

293
00:09:51,509 --> 00:09:48,839
much

294
00:09:52,310 --> 00:09:51,519
coming speeding up to the rear of our uh

295
00:09:55,590 --> 00:09:52,320
convoy

296
00:09:56,870 --> 00:09:55,600
and we'd first have to fire a pin flare

297
00:09:59,110 --> 00:09:56,880
so we'd have to

298
00:10:00,870 --> 00:09:59,120
basically fire a firework at the vehicle

299
00:10:02,790 --> 00:10:00,880
to kind of warn them but if they kept

300
00:10:04,790 --> 00:10:02,800
going then you could fire a warning shot

301
00:10:06,389 --> 00:10:04,800
but not at the vehicle

302
00:10:08,069 --> 00:10:06,399
and then if they were posing an

303
00:10:08,710 --> 00:10:08,079
immediate threat you could fire so it's

304
00:10:12,630 --> 00:10:08,720
essentially

305
00:10:15,590 --> 00:10:12,640
three steps to finally uh be able to

306
00:10:18,470 --> 00:10:15,600
you know but but ultimately you have to

307
00:10:21,910 --> 00:10:18,480
be fired upon in order to fire

308
00:10:24,790 --> 00:10:21,920
essentially yeah i mean yeah

309
00:10:26,069 --> 00:10:24,800
and and that imply applies to almost all

310
00:10:27,829 --> 00:10:26,079
circumstances i mean you're talking

311
00:10:28,949 --> 00:10:27,839
about a convoy but i mean what if it was

312
00:10:31,350 --> 00:10:28,959
uh

313
00:10:32,230 --> 00:10:31,360
you know you're walking along and you

314
00:10:36,069 --> 00:10:32,240
come upon

315
00:10:37,670 --> 00:10:36,079
trouble yeah uh that's definitely one of

316
00:10:39,190 --> 00:10:37,680
those things that you

317
00:10:41,190 --> 00:10:39,200
kind of have to use your best judgment

318
00:10:44,150 --> 00:10:41,200
like if you see a weapon and you

319
00:10:45,030 --> 00:10:44,160
know it's a bad guy i still should

320
00:10:48,630 --> 00:10:45,040
probably

321
00:10:50,230 --> 00:10:48,640
try and not fire at them which is weird

322
00:10:52,310 --> 00:10:50,240
to say but i feel like

323
00:10:54,230 --> 00:10:52,320
that's kind of how it's going especially

324
00:10:57,430 --> 00:10:54,240
probably now well i don't know now

325
00:10:59,990 --> 00:10:57,440
but um and then it's like they're in a

326
00:11:01,030 --> 00:11:00,000
vehicle and you're on foot patrol

327
00:11:03,110 --> 00:11:01,040
that'd probably be a different

328
00:11:05,670 --> 00:11:03,120
circumstance if someone's kind of

329
00:11:07,030 --> 00:11:05,680
flying at you and has no uh show of

330
00:11:08,630 --> 00:11:07,040
stopping then you definitely

331
00:11:10,630 --> 00:11:08,640
could probably fire upon them without

332
00:11:12,550 --> 00:11:10,640
any issues i mean

333
00:11:14,150 --> 00:11:12,560
perhaps it's the difference between you

334
00:11:15,430 --> 00:11:14,160
know once we had already kind of won the

335
00:11:17,990 --> 00:11:15,440
initial battle and we

336
00:11:18,790 --> 00:11:18,000
we went into kind of this peacekeeping

337
00:11:21,829 --> 00:11:18,800
role

338
00:11:23,430 --> 00:11:21,839
want to call it

339
00:11:25,110 --> 00:11:23,440
that that's probably when the rules of

340
00:11:27,829 --> 00:11:25,120
engagement change

341
00:11:29,910 --> 00:11:27,839
perhaps yeah i i definitely think so it

342
00:11:32,069 --> 00:11:29,920
was really weird in 2009 when i went to

343
00:11:34,069 --> 00:11:32,079
afghanistan because

344
00:11:35,590 --> 00:11:34,079
at a certain point in the deployment uh

345
00:11:37,750 --> 00:11:35,600
we weren't allowed to do like night

346
00:11:40,389 --> 00:11:37,760
raids anymore like that was

347
00:11:41,990 --> 00:11:40,399
forbidden like the afghan president said

348
00:11:44,150 --> 00:11:42,000
u.s troops aren't allowed to do night

349
00:11:45,590 --> 00:11:44,160
raids or anything anymore so it's like

350
00:11:49,110 --> 00:11:45,600
they're giving you rules to

351
00:11:53,110 --> 00:11:49,120
fight a war but you know it's just crazy

352
00:11:55,990 --> 00:11:53,120
i can only imagine how things are

353
00:11:57,430 --> 00:11:56,000
have been or are now and the taliban

354
00:11:59,670 --> 00:11:57,440
just sits back and laughs

355
00:12:00,470 --> 00:11:59,680
at it because they've got no rules

356
00:12:05,509 --> 00:12:00,480
exactly

357
00:12:07,110 --> 00:12:05,519
tell us about your experience in

358
00:12:09,430 --> 00:12:07,120
afghanistan how long you were there and

359
00:12:13,030 --> 00:12:09,440
ultimately i know that's where you

360
00:12:14,230 --> 00:12:13,040
were injured yeah afghanistan was very

361
00:12:16,470 --> 00:12:14,240
different for me

362
00:12:17,750 --> 00:12:16,480
um because when i deployed iraq i

363
00:12:19,190 --> 00:12:17,760
actually deployed as a

364
00:12:20,470 --> 00:12:19,200
operating room specialist so i was

365
00:12:21,750 --> 00:12:20,480
working in the medical field in the

366
00:12:24,870 --> 00:12:21,760
operating room

367
00:12:27,590 --> 00:12:24,880
and i was in a bay uh the green zone

368
00:12:28,790 --> 00:12:27,600
in baghdad even seen a hospital so we

369
00:12:31,670 --> 00:12:28,800
were relatively safe

370
00:12:33,430 --> 00:12:31,680
we'd only you know have mortar fire

371
00:12:35,269 --> 00:12:33,440
mortars come in occasionally in the

372
00:12:36,069 --> 00:12:35,279
green zone and we'd have to go duck and

373
00:12:38,949 --> 00:12:36,079
cover

374
00:12:39,990 --> 00:12:38,959
uh but we were in zero danger whatsoever

375
00:12:43,190 --> 00:12:40,000
essentially

376
00:12:45,430 --> 00:12:43,200
and um i actually felt

377
00:12:46,310 --> 00:12:45,440
like we were appreciated in iraq

378
00:12:48,949 --> 00:12:46,320
compared to

379
00:12:51,350 --> 00:12:48,959
when i went to afghanistan uh so when i

380
00:12:53,990 --> 00:12:51,360
went in 2009 to afghanistan

381
00:12:54,949 --> 00:12:54,000
i went as a cavalry scout so it's

382
00:12:56,389 --> 00:12:54,959
totally

383
00:12:58,470 --> 00:12:56,399
opposite end of the spectrum from the

384
00:12:59,430 --> 00:12:58,480
medical field it's a combat arms job

385
00:13:01,430 --> 00:12:59,440
you're doing

386
00:13:02,949 --> 00:13:01,440
a lot of reconnaissance surveillance

387
00:13:05,430 --> 00:13:02,959
presence patrols

388
00:13:06,230 --> 00:13:05,440
and painting targets that would be

389
00:13:09,670 --> 00:13:06,240
essentially

390
00:13:11,350 --> 00:13:09,680
eliminated if they needed to be and um

391
00:13:12,790 --> 00:13:11,360
you know just going out on convoys and

392
00:13:16,550 --> 00:13:12,800
doing patrols

393
00:13:18,629 --> 00:13:16,560
uh the elders most of them just

394
00:13:19,990 --> 00:13:18,639
really didn't want you there the little

395
00:13:22,230 --> 00:13:20,000
kids would throw rocks

396
00:13:24,150 --> 00:13:22,240
spit at you throw bottles of water at

397
00:13:26,230 --> 00:13:24,160
you and you just

398
00:13:28,150 --> 00:13:26,240
i felt no appreciation being there

399
00:13:30,069 --> 00:13:28,160
whatsoever so it's kind of

400
00:13:31,670 --> 00:13:30,079
weird to see two different sides of war

401
00:13:35,509 --> 00:13:31,680
in two different countries

402
00:13:37,910 --> 00:13:35,519
um but yeah and and and just to be clear

403
00:13:38,790 --> 00:13:37,920
in iraq you did feel appreciated people

404
00:13:40,710 --> 00:13:38,800
would come up to you

405
00:13:42,470 --> 00:13:40,720
and you could tell me that they're

406
00:13:45,189 --> 00:13:42,480
grateful for you being there

407
00:13:46,870 --> 00:13:45,199
yeah yeah i i i personally got that

408
00:13:47,990 --> 00:13:46,880
feeling i think a lot of people i

409
00:13:50,389 --> 00:13:48,000
deployed with felt that

410
00:13:52,550 --> 00:13:50,399
way too for the most part but it's

411
00:13:54,790 --> 00:13:52,560
probably different outside the wire

412
00:13:56,389 --> 00:13:54,800
in iraq than it was for us but i wonder

413
00:13:59,350 --> 00:13:56,399
if some of it has to do with how

414
00:14:02,310 --> 00:13:59,360
westernized the country is because iraq

415
00:14:03,269 --> 00:14:02,320
i think is way more westernized than

416
00:14:06,949 --> 00:14:03,279
afghanistan

417
00:14:09,110 --> 00:14:06,959
right so yeah by far right so so iraqis

418
00:14:11,269 --> 00:14:09,120
probably already

419
00:14:13,829 --> 00:14:11,279
very aware of america watching american

420
00:14:16,629 --> 00:14:13,839
movies and

421
00:14:18,949 --> 00:14:16,639
kind of liking america yeah we're in

422
00:14:23,750 --> 00:14:18,959
afghanistan

423
00:14:26,470 --> 00:14:23,760
there you feel like you're back in time

424
00:14:27,350 --> 00:14:26,480
a hundred or a couple hundred years yeah

425
00:14:30,150 --> 00:14:27,360
exactly

426
00:14:31,910 --> 00:14:30,160
i mean these individuals live in mud

427
00:14:34,629 --> 00:14:31,920
huts essentially and

428
00:14:36,629 --> 00:14:34,639
there's no electricity they're very

429
00:14:38,710 --> 00:14:36,639
old-school way of farming they

430
00:14:39,829 --> 00:14:38,720
take drainage ditch for their farms and

431
00:14:41,509 --> 00:14:39,839
everything so it's

432
00:14:43,110 --> 00:14:41,519
i mean they make it work but it's

433
00:14:46,470 --> 00:14:43,120
definitely

434
00:14:49,269 --> 00:14:46,480
very much stuck in their ways

435
00:14:49,829 --> 00:14:49,279
so it was very interesting to see that

436
00:14:51,430 --> 00:14:49,839
side

437
00:14:53,189 --> 00:14:51,440
unless you were in like a big city like

438
00:14:55,110 --> 00:14:53,199
kandahar which they'd have

439
00:14:56,629 --> 00:14:55,120
you know do you think some of it could

440
00:14:58,550 --> 00:14:56,639
have also had to do with the fact that

441
00:15:01,509 --> 00:14:58,560
they know that the taliban

442
00:15:03,189 --> 00:15:01,519
is watching or aware and and so they

443
00:15:05,269 --> 00:15:03,199
have to

444
00:15:06,230 --> 00:15:05,279
at least at minimum pretend to be

445
00:15:09,110 --> 00:15:06,240
against you

446
00:15:10,470 --> 00:15:09,120
could that be part of it yeah absolutely

447
00:15:12,550 --> 00:15:10,480
i didn't even think of that until you

448
00:15:15,030 --> 00:15:12,560
brought that up but that is for sure

449
00:15:15,990 --> 00:15:15,040
something that uh we were actually told

450
00:15:17,910 --> 00:15:16,000
uh you know

451
00:15:19,030 --> 00:15:17,920
if they were to show any allegiance to

452
00:15:21,269 --> 00:15:19,040
the us there

453
00:15:22,949 --> 00:15:21,279
they'd be essentially they could be

454
00:15:25,590 --> 00:15:22,959
killed or the family could be killed or

455
00:15:28,550 --> 00:15:25,600
at least punished in a very severe way

456
00:15:31,990 --> 00:15:28,560
so i i could see that i mean so your job

457
00:15:35,430 --> 00:15:32,000
basically was to continue to try to

458
00:15:38,949 --> 00:15:35,440
root out the taliban yeah

459
00:15:40,790 --> 00:15:38,959
you know it was weird

460
00:15:42,150 --> 00:15:40,800
the big thing was winning hearts and

461
00:15:44,230 --> 00:15:42,160
minds like that was our

462
00:15:47,350 --> 00:15:44,240
main goal in the spin bold act region of

463
00:15:50,949 --> 00:15:47,360
afghanistan and uh

464
00:15:54,310 --> 00:15:50,959
it was just so boring like

465
00:15:56,069 --> 00:15:54,320
there was we were basically stuck on a

466
00:15:58,069 --> 00:15:56,079
forward operating base on the

467
00:15:59,829 --> 00:15:58,079
southeastern part of afghanistan along

468
00:16:03,430 --> 00:15:59,839
the pakistan border

469
00:16:05,430 --> 00:16:03,440
and uh it was a main like a hub for

470
00:16:08,230 --> 00:16:05,440
a lot of their trucks to go across the

471
00:16:10,470 --> 00:16:08,240
border into pakistan and vice versa

472
00:16:11,990 --> 00:16:10,480
so that part was pretty exciting you

473
00:16:14,230 --> 00:16:12,000
know being around

474
00:16:15,910 --> 00:16:14,240
patrolling watching that area but as

475
00:16:17,910 --> 00:16:15,920
soon as you got on the outskirts of

476
00:16:19,829 --> 00:16:17,920
the busy were part of spin bowl deck it

477
00:16:21,430 --> 00:16:19,839
was just

478
00:16:23,110 --> 00:16:21,440
you're like thinking yourself what are

479
00:16:23,749 --> 00:16:23,120
we doing here i mean we're just sitting

480
00:16:25,829 --> 00:16:23,759
here

481
00:16:27,030 --> 00:16:25,839
on a observation post watching this

482
00:16:29,509 --> 00:16:27,040
village where

483
00:16:30,550 --> 00:16:29,519
we don't really have any good intel on

484
00:16:32,150 --> 00:16:30,560
so there's

485
00:16:33,910 --> 00:16:32,160
we feel like there's no reason we should

486
00:16:37,350 --> 00:16:33,920
be watching it but

487
00:16:40,710 --> 00:16:37,360
it's just

488
00:16:41,829 --> 00:16:40,720
i don't it's weird and what were you

489
00:16:44,710 --> 00:16:41,839
supposed to do to

490
00:16:46,069 --> 00:16:44,720
win hearts and minds that's a very good

491
00:16:47,829 --> 00:16:46,079
question because i could never figure

492
00:16:50,870 --> 00:16:47,839
that out

493
00:16:53,030 --> 00:16:50,880
i mean just giving giving them mre

494
00:16:56,150 --> 00:16:53,040
rations or water bottles is

495
00:16:57,030 --> 00:16:56,160
all we could essentially do but i i

496
00:16:59,430 --> 00:16:57,040
really don't know

497
00:17:01,189 --> 00:16:59,440
that's something i was never able to

498
00:17:02,550 --> 00:17:01,199
understand and i imagine that most of

499
00:17:04,630 --> 00:17:02,560
them don't speak english so it's not

500
00:17:07,669 --> 00:17:04,640
real easy to communicate with them

501
00:17:09,909 --> 00:17:07,679
not one bit not one bit we did have a

502
00:17:12,000 --> 00:17:09,919
translator though with us and uh

503
00:17:13,750 --> 00:17:12,010
every once in a while um

504
00:17:15,350 --> 00:17:13,760
[Music]

505
00:17:17,510 --> 00:17:15,360
he'd come out with us but for the most

506
00:17:19,429 --> 00:17:17,520
part we we weren't really

507
00:17:20,870 --> 00:17:19,439
uh interacting at least when i was there

508
00:17:23,350 --> 00:17:20,880
for the three months before i got

509
00:17:26,069 --> 00:17:23,360
wounded we we didn't really do any

510
00:17:27,110 --> 00:17:26,079
uh presence patrols by foot so we didn't

511
00:17:30,630 --> 00:17:27,120
get to interact

512
00:17:32,870 --> 00:17:30,640
as closely as uh they did later down the

513
00:17:35,909 --> 00:17:32,880
road after i got hurt

514
00:17:39,510 --> 00:17:35,919
yeah so tell us about that yeah

515
00:17:41,750 --> 00:17:39,520
so september 13th 2009

516
00:17:43,590 --> 00:17:41,760
is when my life pretty much did a com

517
00:17:46,390 --> 00:17:43,600
did a complete 180.

518
00:17:48,549 --> 00:17:46,400
uh we were three months into the tour

519
00:17:52,390 --> 00:17:48,559
and we were on just a regular routine

520
00:17:55,430 --> 00:17:52,400
uh patrol presence patrol and a convoy

521
00:17:58,549 --> 00:17:55,440
and um you know just driving along

522
00:18:01,350 --> 00:17:58,559
and in the vehicle you kind of

523
00:18:02,470 --> 00:18:01,360
rig up your ipod to your comms so you

524
00:18:04,870 --> 00:18:02,480
can listen to music

525
00:18:06,630 --> 00:18:04,880
and also listen to radio traffic if

526
00:18:09,750 --> 00:18:06,640
anything important is coming along

527
00:18:11,750 --> 00:18:09,760
uh so i remember we were i was driving

528
00:18:13,909 --> 00:18:11,760
the vehicle i was the fourth vehicle

529
00:18:15,029 --> 00:18:13,919
uh in the convoy of four so i was the

530
00:18:17,590 --> 00:18:15,039
last vehicle

531
00:18:19,350 --> 00:18:17,600
and we were just listening to music

532
00:18:20,950 --> 00:18:19,360
singing to kenny chesney

533
00:18:22,549 --> 00:18:20,960
country stuff like she thinks my

534
00:18:25,669 --> 00:18:22,559
tractor's sexy

535
00:18:29,110 --> 00:18:25,679
and everything just went black

536
00:18:32,390 --> 00:18:29,120
like i remember just pure

537
00:18:33,909 --> 00:18:32,400
blackness and it took me a while to

538
00:18:35,909 --> 00:18:33,919
come to i think i was knocked

539
00:18:38,230 --> 00:18:35,919
unconscious for about 45

540
00:18:39,990 --> 00:18:38,240
seconds and i didn't realize what

541
00:18:41,029 --> 00:18:40,000
happened at all i just felt like we hit

542
00:18:43,590 --> 00:18:41,039
a brick wall

543
00:18:45,270 --> 00:18:43,600
and what had happened was i drove over a

544
00:18:46,310 --> 00:18:45,280
pressure plate improvised explosive

545
00:18:49,110 --> 00:18:46,320
device

546
00:18:50,710 --> 00:18:49,120
and setting that off it went off

547
00:18:52,150 --> 00:18:50,720
completely underneath the driver's seat

548
00:18:54,789 --> 00:18:52,160
where i was sitting

549
00:18:56,390 --> 00:18:54,799
and on the striker vehicle there's a

550
00:18:58,710 --> 00:18:56,400
inch thick armor plate

551
00:19:00,549 --> 00:18:58,720
and it pushed up that armor plate and

552
00:19:03,669 --> 00:19:00,559
crushed my legs into the driver's

553
00:19:06,070 --> 00:19:03,679
uh steering wheel compartment and

554
00:19:07,270 --> 00:19:06,080
uh when i realized what was going on i

555
00:19:10,310 --> 00:19:07,280
just

556
00:19:10,870 --> 00:19:10,320
tried to gather up as much as a big

557
00:19:14,390 --> 00:19:10,880
breath

558
00:19:17,029 --> 00:19:14,400
because just all the dust and fumes

559
00:19:19,750 --> 00:19:17,039
you're choking on all that stuff kind of

560
00:19:21,830 --> 00:19:19,760
coming soon and things are really hazy

561
00:19:23,669 --> 00:19:21,840
and i just remember hearing them scream

562
00:19:27,270 --> 00:19:23,679
my last name like

563
00:19:29,110 --> 00:19:27,280
and i just let out this god-awful scream

564
00:19:31,990 --> 00:19:29,120
i can only imagine what it sounded like

565
00:19:34,870 --> 00:19:32,000
but i'm sure it didn't sound too great

566
00:19:36,310 --> 00:19:34,880
but i feel like it was probably good for

567
00:19:38,070 --> 00:19:36,320
them to hear because they knew i was

568
00:19:40,630 --> 00:19:38,080
alive

569
00:19:42,470 --> 00:19:40,640
but then as things started to calm down

570
00:19:44,710 --> 00:19:42,480
i had looked at my legs

571
00:19:47,110 --> 00:19:44,720
and my left leg felt fine i could see my

572
00:19:49,110 --> 00:19:47,120
whole entire left leg

573
00:19:51,510 --> 00:19:49,120
but i looked at my right leg and i saw

574
00:19:53,590 --> 00:19:51,520
nothing below my right knee so i

575
00:19:54,630 --> 00:19:53,600
pretty much assumed it was gone at that

576
00:19:57,830 --> 00:19:54,640
moment

577
00:19:59,990 --> 00:19:57,840
and yeah it was

578
00:20:00,870 --> 00:20:00,000
pretty crazy having that experience

579
00:20:03,350 --> 00:20:00,880
because

580
00:20:04,230 --> 00:20:03,360
when i tried to explain the feeling of

581
00:20:07,350 --> 00:20:04,240
that

582
00:20:09,909 --> 00:20:07,360
i felt like my entire lower half of my

583
00:20:10,950 --> 00:20:09,919
body was just being squeezed by a vice

584
00:20:13,750 --> 00:20:10,960
and there was like

585
00:20:14,310 --> 00:20:13,760
an immense amount of pressure and i

586
00:20:16,070 --> 00:20:14,320
remember

587
00:20:17,830 --> 00:20:16,080
the adrenaline going through my body

588
00:20:20,149 --> 00:20:17,840
like i didn't even shed a tear

589
00:20:21,750 --> 00:20:20,159
during that time so it was kind of

590
00:20:23,990 --> 00:20:21,760
incredible to think that way i didn't

591
00:20:25,830 --> 00:20:24,000
cry or shed a tear

592
00:20:28,310 --> 00:20:25,840
but i just felt this immense amount of

593
00:20:31,430 --> 00:20:28,320
pressure below my waist

594
00:20:33,669 --> 00:20:31,440
pressure and pain pain

595
00:20:35,740 --> 00:20:33,679
yes but it was pretty much blocked off

596
00:20:36,870 --> 00:20:35,750
because of the adrenaline

597
00:20:40,870 --> 00:20:36,880
[Music]

598
00:20:42,549 --> 00:20:40,880
so it was just really crazy what

599
00:20:44,149 --> 00:20:42,559
the enviro the events that kind of

600
00:20:45,830 --> 00:20:44,159
transpired because

601
00:20:47,510 --> 00:20:45,840
when they were extracting me from the

602
00:20:48,870 --> 00:20:47,520
vehicle they tried to bring me through

603
00:20:50,230 --> 00:20:48,880
the top of the vehicle through the

604
00:20:52,789 --> 00:20:50,240
driver's hatch

605
00:20:54,950 --> 00:20:52,799
and they couldn't and i didn't realize

606
00:20:56,710 --> 00:20:54,960
this at the time but my lower right leg

607
00:20:58,630 --> 00:20:56,720
was stuck in the engine compartment

608
00:21:00,230 --> 00:20:58,640
which would be on the driver's immediate

609
00:21:02,789 --> 00:21:00,240
right

610
00:21:03,750 --> 00:21:02,799
and they weren't able to basically pull

611
00:21:06,789 --> 00:21:03,760
me up through

612
00:21:08,149 --> 00:21:06,799
the top because my leg was stuck in the

613
00:21:10,230 --> 00:21:08,159
engine compartment

614
00:21:11,750 --> 00:21:10,240
uh so my platoon sergeant had to go to

615
00:21:15,270 --> 00:21:11,760
the back of the vehicle

616
00:21:17,110 --> 00:21:15,280
and he lowered my seat uh backwards

617
00:21:18,630 --> 00:21:17,120
uh cut my seatbelt off and i just

618
00:21:21,029 --> 00:21:18,640
remember him

619
00:21:22,950 --> 00:21:21,039
pull pulling both of his putting both

620
00:21:25,990 --> 00:21:22,960
his arms underneath my armpits

621
00:21:27,830 --> 00:21:26,000
and just pulling and that's when

622
00:21:29,990 --> 00:21:27,840
i felt probably the most disgusting

623
00:21:33,029 --> 00:21:30,000
thing in my life just feeling my

624
00:21:34,710 --> 00:21:33,039
left femur kind of crumble uh you like

625
00:21:37,909 --> 00:21:34,720
just feeling the bones rub

626
00:21:38,950 --> 00:21:37,919
i was cringe-worthy like it was totally

627
00:21:42,789 --> 00:21:38,960
cringe-worthy

628
00:21:44,710 --> 00:21:42,799
but it didn't hurt which was wild um

629
00:21:46,310 --> 00:21:44,720
once they got me out of the driver's

630
00:21:50,070 --> 00:21:46,320
compartment they

631
00:21:52,470 --> 00:21:50,080
you know my medic didn't skip a beat he

632
00:21:53,190 --> 00:21:52,480
started an ivy right away hit me up with

633
00:21:56,630 --> 00:21:53,200
uh

634
00:21:59,190 --> 00:21:56,640
morphine and i i just remember

635
00:22:00,470 --> 00:21:59,200
telling myself uh while this was going

636
00:22:01,909 --> 00:22:00,480
on and while they were sending up the

637
00:22:04,390 --> 00:22:01,919
nine line medevac

638
00:22:05,590 --> 00:22:04,400
that uh you know being a medical

639
00:22:07,669 --> 00:22:05,600
professional i was kind of

640
00:22:09,990 --> 00:22:07,679
trying to in my head keep telling myself

641
00:22:13,430 --> 00:22:10,000
to keep calm just keep breathing

642
00:22:15,029 --> 00:22:13,440
um and while this was happening i

643
00:22:17,350 --> 00:22:15,039
remember

644
00:22:19,669 --> 00:22:17,360
my arms because of all the shock and

645
00:22:22,230 --> 00:22:19,679
trauma my body was experiencing my arms

646
00:22:24,789 --> 00:22:22,240
was kind of like stiffening up like this

647
00:22:25,350 --> 00:22:24,799
and my medic was trying to put the iv in

648
00:22:27,270 --> 00:22:25,360
but

649
00:22:28,950 --> 00:22:27,280
he wasn't able to because my arms were

650
00:22:30,549 --> 00:22:28,960
curled and he's like you gotta

651
00:22:31,669 --> 00:22:30,559
straighten out your arms i'm like dude i

652
00:22:34,070 --> 00:22:31,679
can't

653
00:22:35,590 --> 00:22:34,080
like i think my body was just going into

654
00:22:38,870 --> 00:22:35,600
shock with everything

655
00:22:42,390 --> 00:22:38,880
uh but he eventually got the iv in and

656
00:22:45,830 --> 00:22:42,400
it was yeah it was crazy how

657
00:22:49,270 --> 00:22:45,840
good that stuff works like i don't

658
00:22:52,470 --> 00:22:49,280
i don't remember too much of

659
00:22:55,510 --> 00:22:52,480
uh too much

660
00:22:58,710 --> 00:22:55,520
of anything after that aside from

661
00:23:00,310 --> 00:22:58,720
one of my uh buddies i asked him how my

662
00:23:02,470 --> 00:23:00,320
teeth looked because

663
00:23:03,510 --> 00:23:02,480
my one of my lower tooth felt like it

664
00:23:05,830 --> 00:23:03,520
was missing

665
00:23:07,430 --> 00:23:05,840
and i was like are my teeth all right or

666
00:23:09,590 --> 00:23:07,440
my teeth missing he's like

667
00:23:11,110 --> 00:23:09,600
brother your teeth are the last of your

668
00:23:13,669 --> 00:23:11,120
problems right now and nobody wants to

669
00:23:15,909 --> 00:23:13,679
see your ugly mug anyways

670
00:23:17,029 --> 00:23:15,919
so it's kind of good to have that

671
00:23:19,590 --> 00:23:17,039
feeling of knowing

672
00:23:20,789 --> 00:23:19,600
i knew i was going to be okay at that

673
00:23:23,750 --> 00:23:20,799
moment

674
00:23:25,190 --> 00:23:23,760
i was able to laugh and within 45

675
00:23:28,789 --> 00:23:25,200
minutes i was uh

676
00:23:31,590 --> 00:23:28,799
airlifted to kandahar uh airfield and

677
00:23:32,310 --> 00:23:31,600
i went into emergency surgery there and

678
00:23:33,750 --> 00:23:32,320
that was um

679
00:23:35,909 --> 00:23:33,760
[Music]

680
00:23:36,789 --> 00:23:35,919
one of the most terrifying moments in my

681
00:23:39,270 --> 00:23:36,799
life

682
00:23:40,070 --> 00:23:39,280
uh just seeing all the people in the er

683
00:23:41,510 --> 00:23:40,080
that

684
00:23:43,190 --> 00:23:41,520
were looking at you they want to get

685
00:23:45,430 --> 00:23:43,200
their hands on you to help you

686
00:23:46,230 --> 00:23:45,440
but at that moment you're so vulnerable

687
00:23:48,870 --> 00:23:46,240
and

688
00:23:49,990 --> 00:23:48,880
you just feel like there's everything's

689
00:23:52,870 --> 00:23:50,000
out of your control

690
00:23:54,390 --> 00:23:52,880
and you know knowing that i was going to

691
00:23:56,310 --> 00:23:54,400
be on the operating room table

692
00:23:57,430 --> 00:23:56,320
knowing what can happen on the operating

693
00:23:59,269 --> 00:23:57,440
room table

694
00:24:01,269 --> 00:23:59,279
uh was something that was definitely

695
00:24:05,909 --> 00:24:01,279
rolling through my mind but

696
00:24:08,149 --> 00:24:05,919
you know i was lucky i ended up having

697
00:24:09,190 --> 00:24:08,159
external fixator on my lower right leg

698
00:24:12,470 --> 00:24:09,200
as well as

699
00:24:14,470 --> 00:24:12,480
both of my femurs and waking up and

700
00:24:17,350 --> 00:24:14,480
seeing i still had both my legs was a

701
00:24:18,789 --> 00:24:17,360
pretty awesome feeling

702
00:24:20,390 --> 00:24:18,799
is it fair to say that you were

703
00:24:25,990 --> 00:24:20,400
surprised

704
00:24:29,830 --> 00:24:26,000
i was shocked when i woke up and i saw

705
00:24:34,390 --> 00:24:29,840
that you know i saw my right foot

706
00:24:36,630 --> 00:24:34,400
wow wow you got to be very grateful to

707
00:24:38,149 --> 00:24:36,640
everyone uh starting with the medic and

708
00:24:40,870 --> 00:24:38,159
and your oh yeah

709
00:24:42,870 --> 00:24:40,880
fellow soldiers and then the the doctors

710
00:24:44,950 --> 00:24:42,880
and everybody at the hospital

711
00:24:45,990 --> 00:24:44,960
yeah absolutely they did an amazing job

712
00:24:47,590 --> 00:24:46,000
and i've been

713
00:24:49,350 --> 00:24:47,600
getting you the the helicopter so

714
00:24:51,830 --> 00:24:49,360
quickly too

715
00:24:53,350 --> 00:24:51,840
yeah yeah it was uh actually the air

716
00:24:56,390 --> 00:24:53,360
force pair of rescue

717
00:24:57,990 --> 00:24:56,400
uh jumpers the jolly green guys that

718
00:25:00,470 --> 00:24:58,000
came out and got me and

719
00:25:01,110 --> 00:25:00,480
i actually kept in contact with a couple

720
00:25:02,950 --> 00:25:01,120
of them

721
00:25:05,029 --> 00:25:02,960
and i'm hoping to meet them again

722
00:25:07,190 --> 00:25:05,039
eventually sometime soon so i'm

723
00:25:08,390 --> 00:25:07,200
getting kind of excited about that did

724
00:25:11,510 --> 00:25:08,400
they actually land

725
00:25:14,149 --> 00:25:11,520
to pick you up or they yeah yeah

726
00:25:15,110 --> 00:25:14,159
yeah yeah they landed uh my platoon had

727
00:25:18,149 --> 00:25:15,120
set up a

728
00:25:19,830 --> 00:25:18,159
landing zone for them um transferred me

729
00:25:20,630 --> 00:25:19,840
to the black hawk and then uh and you

730
00:25:23,430 --> 00:25:20,640
were pretty much

731
00:25:24,149 --> 00:25:23,440
the only one injured yeah i was the only

732
00:25:28,149 --> 00:25:24,159
one injured

733
00:25:29,350 --> 00:25:28,159
uh my medic i think he hit his head but

734
00:25:33,110 --> 00:25:29,360
it wasn't anything

735
00:25:34,710 --> 00:25:33,120
serious at all and i'm grateful that i'm

736
00:25:35,510 --> 00:25:34,720
actually the only one that got injured

737
00:25:37,110 --> 00:25:35,520
because

738
00:25:38,789 --> 00:25:37,120
i feel like the putts that drove over

739
00:25:41,430 --> 00:25:38,799
the ied

740
00:25:42,230 --> 00:25:41,440
but you said you were the fourth car so

741
00:25:43,830 --> 00:25:42,240
i was

742
00:25:45,830 --> 00:25:43,840
yeah and it's weird to think about

743
00:25:46,630 --> 00:25:45,840
because i was following the tracks in

744
00:25:49,669 --> 00:25:46,640
front of me

745
00:25:50,630 --> 00:25:49,679
and i must have been an inch or two mark

746
00:25:53,350 --> 00:25:50,640
to left or right

747
00:25:54,549 --> 00:25:53,360
of the tracks and i just happened to hit

748
00:25:57,269 --> 00:25:54,559
the pressure plate

749
00:25:58,149 --> 00:25:57,279
wow well the the other thing to be

750
00:26:00,390 --> 00:25:58,159
appreciative of

751
00:26:01,669 --> 00:26:00,400
is the that one inch of armor or

752
00:26:03,190 --> 00:26:01,679
whatever it is that

753
00:26:04,950 --> 00:26:03,200
they put in the vehicle are these

754
00:26:06,710 --> 00:26:04,960
humvees or

755
00:26:08,390 --> 00:26:06,720
so they're striker vehicles there

756
00:26:09,350 --> 00:26:08,400
there's four wheels on each side of the

757
00:26:12,310 --> 00:26:09,360
vehicle and it

758
00:26:13,029 --> 00:26:12,320
almost looks like a tank and uh there's

759
00:26:15,669 --> 00:26:13,039
like

760
00:26:16,470 --> 00:26:15,679
oh gosh six different versions four of

761
00:26:19,029 --> 00:26:16,480
them now

762
00:26:19,990 --> 00:26:19,039
but uh ours is a reconnaissance one so

763
00:26:23,590 --> 00:26:20,000
we had

764
00:26:26,149 --> 00:26:23,600
the driver uh the vehicle commander

765
00:26:28,070 --> 00:26:26,159
and like four dismounts so there's about

766
00:26:30,070 --> 00:26:28,080
six people in our vehicle

767
00:26:31,590 --> 00:26:30,080
and uh yeah thankfully i was the only

768
00:26:33,269 --> 00:26:31,600
one that got hurt and i'm

769
00:26:34,710 --> 00:26:33,279
grateful for that yeah but i mean but

770
00:26:38,230 --> 00:26:34,720
for that armor you'd probably

771
00:26:41,350 --> 00:26:38,240
be dead right yeah i i yeah it was

772
00:26:44,310 --> 00:26:41,360
it was a pretty significant blast

773
00:26:45,830 --> 00:26:44,320
so um so and what were what was the main

774
00:26:47,590 --> 00:26:45,840
thing they were able to do to save your

775
00:26:50,710 --> 00:26:47,600
leg

776
00:26:51,110 --> 00:26:50,720
so they did a limb salvage uh once i got

777
00:26:55,029 --> 00:26:51,120
back

778
00:26:58,390 --> 00:26:55,039
surgeries i had was

779
00:27:00,470 --> 00:26:58,400
uh external fixator placed on my uh

780
00:27:02,070 --> 00:27:00,480
lower right leg which suffered the most

781
00:27:05,190 --> 00:27:02,080
damage and

782
00:27:08,470 --> 00:27:05,200
and what's going to fix yeah it's a

783
00:27:09,909 --> 00:27:08,480
an external fixator is almost like an

784
00:27:12,549 --> 00:27:09,919
erector set

785
00:27:13,029 --> 00:27:12,559
like you can put it on all the limbs

786
00:27:15,590 --> 00:27:13,039
i've see

787
00:27:16,549 --> 00:27:15,600
i actually had a small one on my pelvis

788
00:27:20,549 --> 00:27:16,559
too for

789
00:27:23,510 --> 00:27:20,559
a pelvic fracture i had um but there's

790
00:27:24,470 --> 00:27:23,520
four uh they look like drill bits

791
00:27:27,590 --> 00:27:24,480
basically

792
00:27:31,029 --> 00:27:27,600
uh they place four drill bits on

793
00:27:31,350 --> 00:27:31,039
uh two on distal side of a fracture and

794
00:27:33,909 --> 00:27:31,360
two

795
00:27:35,190 --> 00:27:33,919
on the proximal side of the fracture so

796
00:27:35,909 --> 00:27:35,200
say the fracture would be in the middle

797
00:27:38,789 --> 00:27:35,919
there'd be like

798
00:27:39,269 --> 00:27:38,799
two uh drill bit looking things on each

799
00:27:44,310 --> 00:27:39,279
uh

800
00:27:46,549 --> 00:27:44,320
fiber rod it would just stabilize your

801
00:27:48,950 --> 00:27:46,559
leg basically holding it together until

802
00:27:49,750 --> 00:27:48,960
kind of this frame around your leg

803
00:27:52,710 --> 00:27:49,760
exactly

804
00:27:54,389 --> 00:27:52,720
yeah if you've ever seen what uh if

805
00:27:55,590 --> 00:27:54,399
you've seen what alex smith had that's

806
00:27:57,029 --> 00:27:55,600
exactly what i had

807
00:27:58,310 --> 00:27:57,039
right right right yeah i just didn't

808
00:27:59,830 --> 00:27:58,320
know what they were called but but now i

809
00:28:02,070 --> 00:27:59,840
know what you're talking about

810
00:28:03,110 --> 00:28:02,080
so and how many you had further

811
00:28:06,230 --> 00:28:03,120
operations

812
00:28:07,269 --> 00:28:06,240
back in the states i did i actually got

813
00:28:10,070 --> 00:28:07,279
back in the states

814
00:28:11,350 --> 00:28:10,080
on september 18th so five days from

815
00:28:13,510 --> 00:28:11,360
point of impact

816
00:28:16,070 --> 00:28:13,520
and i was sent to brook army medical

817
00:28:18,149 --> 00:28:16,080
center in san antonio texas

818
00:28:19,990 --> 00:28:18,159
which is kind of where my story began

819
00:28:21,669 --> 00:28:20,000
because that was my first duty simon as

820
00:28:23,830 --> 00:28:21,679
a medical specialist

821
00:28:25,830 --> 00:28:23,840
and you know one of the doctors i

822
00:28:27,669 --> 00:28:25,840
deployed to iraq with when he found out

823
00:28:28,710 --> 00:28:27,679
i was changing my job when we got back

824
00:28:30,710 --> 00:28:28,720
home

825
00:28:32,630 --> 00:28:30,720
he said i better not ever see you on my

826
00:28:34,630 --> 00:28:32,640
operating room table well

827
00:28:36,310 --> 00:28:34,640
september 18th i was on his operating

828
00:28:40,310 --> 00:28:36,320
room table

829
00:28:42,470 --> 00:28:40,320
um yeah and i think in the four years

830
00:28:44,070 --> 00:28:42,480
i spent recovering at brooke army

831
00:28:47,750 --> 00:28:44,080
medical center in the limb salvage

832
00:28:51,269 --> 00:28:47,760
program i had

833
00:28:53,909 --> 00:28:51,279
at least 20 surgeries total

834
00:28:56,070 --> 00:28:53,919
and i honestly didn't even know the

835
00:28:59,430 --> 00:28:56,080
extent of my injuries

836
00:29:02,950 --> 00:28:59,440
i was pretty naive um at first

837
00:29:04,710 --> 00:29:02,960
until uh this doctor dr joseph shu

838
00:29:05,990 --> 00:29:04,720
was telling me like he's like dude

839
00:29:07,909 --> 00:29:06,000
you're not gonna go back

840
00:29:09,269 --> 00:29:07,919
and see your friends anytime soon so you

841
00:29:11,350 --> 00:29:09,279
better just kind of

842
00:29:13,590 --> 00:29:11,360
take it easy on your physical therapy

843
00:29:17,909 --> 00:29:13,600
and just let your body heal but

844
00:29:20,389 --> 00:29:17,919
four years in recovery was very humbling

845
00:29:21,190 --> 00:29:20,399
so and when you say four years does that

846
00:29:23,590 --> 00:29:21,200
mean that

847
00:29:25,510 --> 00:29:23,600
after four years you were fully

848
00:29:27,430 --> 00:29:25,520
recovered or to whatever extent you were

849
00:29:29,750 --> 00:29:27,440
going to be able to recover

850
00:29:30,630 --> 00:29:29,760
exactly yeah uh four years i was still

851
00:29:34,070 --> 00:29:30,640
active duty

852
00:29:35,750 --> 00:29:34,080
um and my job at that point was just

853
00:29:38,310 --> 00:29:35,760
going to all my medical appointments

854
00:29:41,510 --> 00:29:38,320
going to physical therapy every day

855
00:29:44,470 --> 00:29:41,520
and still doing uh very

856
00:29:45,350 --> 00:29:44,480
minimal uh actual military type stuff

857
00:29:48,310 --> 00:29:45,360
but

858
00:29:49,350 --> 00:29:48,320
uh that was my job for four years and i

859
00:29:51,990 --> 00:29:49,360
was

860
00:29:54,149 --> 00:29:52,000
unfortunately uh medically retired in

861
00:29:56,630 --> 00:29:54,159
august of 2013.

862
00:29:58,389 --> 00:29:56,640
and that was definitely not in my books

863
00:30:01,830 --> 00:29:58,399
because i definitely wanted to stay

864
00:30:04,950 --> 00:30:01,840
in for life and what about

865
00:30:06,230 --> 00:30:04,960
um ptsd did you feel like you suffered

866
00:30:10,870 --> 00:30:06,240
from that

867
00:30:14,389 --> 00:30:12,789
i i was gonna say better but it hasn't

868
00:30:16,310 --> 00:30:14,399
gotten better it's just been a little

869
00:30:19,269 --> 00:30:16,320
bit more spread out like i have a lot of

870
00:30:20,789 --> 00:30:19,279
uh nightmares and insomnia uh when i do

871
00:30:23,350 --> 00:30:20,799
sleep i haven't sound or

872
00:30:24,789 --> 00:30:23,360
nightmares and every once in a while my

873
00:30:26,549 --> 00:30:24,799
wife will

874
00:30:28,470 --> 00:30:26,559
hear me like scream in the middle of the

875
00:30:30,870 --> 00:30:28,480
night and she'll kind of calm me down

876
00:30:32,230 --> 00:30:30,880
or sometimes i'll just wake up in a cold

877
00:30:34,950 --> 00:30:32,240
sweat and panic

878
00:30:36,950 --> 00:30:34,960
and just catch my breath uh just because

879
00:30:40,389 --> 00:30:36,960
we're talking about still today

880
00:30:41,269 --> 00:30:40,399
still today yeah still today um and for

881
00:30:44,630 --> 00:30:41,279
the most part

882
00:30:47,430 --> 00:30:44,640
uh the medications really helped i know

883
00:30:49,350 --> 00:30:47,440
uh for a while i tried to have my

884
00:30:50,870 --> 00:30:49,360
medication lowered because i wanted to

885
00:30:53,269 --> 00:30:50,880
see where i was at

886
00:30:54,310 --> 00:30:53,279
and i was actually at the lowest dose

887
00:30:56,470 --> 00:30:54,320
they could give me

888
00:30:59,430 --> 00:30:56,480
and one of the doctors basically called

889
00:31:01,750 --> 00:30:59,440
it a non-effective dose

890
00:31:03,750 --> 00:31:01,760
and it wasn't working i actually had to

891
00:31:05,590 --> 00:31:03,760
go back up on my medication which is

892
00:31:08,870 --> 00:31:05,600
what medication is it

893
00:31:11,669 --> 00:31:08,880
uh mertazapine is what i use for sleep

894
00:31:12,710 --> 00:31:11,679
but it's also uh for anxiety and

895
00:31:15,430 --> 00:31:12,720
depression

896
00:31:17,430 --> 00:31:15,440
and also venlafaxine which is more for

897
00:31:19,350 --> 00:31:17,440
depression and anxiety

898
00:31:20,789 --> 00:31:19,360
and do you believe that ptsd all stems

899
00:31:24,149 --> 00:31:20,799
from the

900
00:31:24,950 --> 00:31:24,159
uh the the accident or or the incident

901
00:31:26,950 --> 00:31:24,960
or

902
00:31:28,230 --> 00:31:26,960
something else it actually it actually

903
00:31:30,950 --> 00:31:28,240
started before that

904
00:31:32,470 --> 00:31:30,960
it started um after i came back from

905
00:31:36,630 --> 00:31:32,480
iraq

906
00:31:39,110 --> 00:31:36,640
but it was also pretty

907
00:31:40,789 --> 00:31:39,120
mentally traumatizing because you know

908
00:31:43,830 --> 00:31:40,799
at 20 years old i had never

909
00:31:45,750 --> 00:31:43,840
ever seen anyone die in front of me and

910
00:31:49,430 --> 00:31:45,760
having that occurrence happen on the

911
00:31:53,190 --> 00:31:49,440
operating room table i was working on

912
00:31:55,269 --> 00:31:53,200
for the first time i just remember i

913
00:31:56,389 --> 00:31:55,279
this kid and i always say kid very

914
00:31:58,149 --> 00:31:56,399
lightly because

915
00:32:00,230 --> 00:31:58,159
they're all pretty much grown-ass adults

916
00:32:03,350 --> 00:32:00,240
when you're fighting for your country um

917
00:32:05,750 --> 00:32:03,360
but this individual uh u.s soldier

918
00:32:07,750 --> 00:32:05,760
passed on our operating room table after

919
00:32:11,029 --> 00:32:07,760
we've been working so hard

920
00:32:13,350 --> 00:32:11,039
on him and i immediately thought that

921
00:32:14,630 --> 00:32:13,360
it wasn't fair that he was dying he was

922
00:32:16,630 --> 00:32:14,640
could have been younger than me could

923
00:32:19,350 --> 00:32:16,640
have had a wife for kids of his own

924
00:32:20,630 --> 00:32:19,360
and i was 20 single i mean i had parents

925
00:32:22,789 --> 00:32:20,640
and all that stuff but i didn't have a

926
00:32:25,590 --> 00:32:22,799
girlfriend or anything so i was like

927
00:32:28,149 --> 00:32:25,600
uh i i had i had to do more and that's

928
00:32:31,750 --> 00:32:28,159
part of the reason why i changed my job

929
00:32:35,830 --> 00:32:31,760
but just seeing the amount of death and

930
00:32:37,350 --> 00:32:35,840
the you know physical traumas of war

931
00:32:39,430 --> 00:32:37,360
was something that i really struggled

932
00:32:42,149 --> 00:32:39,440
with and i didn't realize it

933
00:32:44,389 --> 00:32:42,159
until like a year or two after i

934
00:32:45,430 --> 00:32:44,399
deployed iraq i noticed a lot of things

935
00:32:47,509 --> 00:32:45,440
change in me

936
00:32:49,430 --> 00:32:47,519
and my family noticed too they noticed

937
00:32:52,070 --> 00:32:49,440
that you know

938
00:32:54,950 --> 00:32:52,080
before i deployed i was always joking

939
00:32:57,430 --> 00:32:54,960
around and very outgoing outspoken

940
00:32:59,350 --> 00:32:57,440
always happy and smiling and they

941
00:32:59,750 --> 00:32:59,360
noticed when i came back i just looked

942
00:33:03,350 --> 00:32:59,760
like

943
00:33:06,470 --> 00:33:03,360
old

944
00:33:09,750 --> 00:33:06,480
and i was no longer that bubbly happy

945
00:33:10,470 --> 00:33:09,760
joking person and what about did you

946
00:33:11,909 --> 00:33:10,480
also have

947
00:33:13,430 --> 00:33:11,919
trouble with those feelings when you're

948
00:33:14,870 --> 00:33:13,440
back from iraq or then back from

949
00:33:16,950 --> 00:33:14,880
afghanistan of

950
00:33:17,990 --> 00:33:16,960
you know guilt that you know your your

951
00:33:20,149 --> 00:33:18,000
buddies are there

952
00:33:22,870 --> 00:33:20,159
and and putting their lives on the line

953
00:33:25,990 --> 00:33:22,880
and you feel like you need to be there

954
00:33:28,070 --> 00:33:26,000
absolutely like like i said i was very

955
00:33:29,669 --> 00:33:28,080
naive i didn't realize the extents of my

956
00:33:32,389 --> 00:33:29,679
injuries and i should have

957
00:33:33,909 --> 00:33:32,399
um because i've worked on individuals

958
00:33:37,990 --> 00:33:33,919
that had these injuries

959
00:33:41,669 --> 00:33:38,000
um but i was very

960
00:33:44,710 --> 00:33:41,679
very disappointed i was very guilty of

961
00:33:45,909 --> 00:33:44,720
you know being home safe and i know my

962
00:33:47,350 --> 00:33:45,919
bodies are happy that i was

963
00:33:49,590 --> 00:33:47,360
home and safe but i would have rather

964
00:33:52,070 --> 00:33:49,600
been with them and i tried during

965
00:33:55,190 --> 00:33:52,080
physical therapy just to push myself as

966
00:33:56,230 --> 00:33:55,200
hard as i could to try and get back to

967
00:33:58,149 --> 00:33:56,240
them but

968
00:34:01,190 --> 00:33:58,159
in doing so i was just doing a lot more

969
00:34:03,590 --> 00:34:01,200
damage to my body so i really had to

970
00:34:05,430 --> 00:34:03,600
heed the doctor's advice and let my body

971
00:34:08,710 --> 00:34:05,440
do the healing

972
00:34:10,629 --> 00:34:08,720
for the ptsd um i'm curious what kind of

973
00:34:12,950 --> 00:34:10,639
treatment you receive besides the

974
00:34:13,829 --> 00:34:12,960
medication because on our show we've

975
00:34:17,270 --> 00:34:13,839
talked about

976
00:34:18,230 --> 00:34:17,280
this emdr treatment after this rapid eye

977
00:34:20,550 --> 00:34:18,240
movement

978
00:34:21,990 --> 00:34:20,560
thing that they use lasers with and kind

979
00:34:23,669 --> 00:34:22,000
of it's a resetting of the brain thing

980
00:34:26,550 --> 00:34:23,679
have you heard of this

981
00:34:28,149 --> 00:34:26,560
i haven't um what i have tried i've

982
00:34:29,270 --> 00:34:28,159
definitely tried the groups and

983
00:34:32,790 --> 00:34:29,280
individual

984
00:34:34,550 --> 00:34:32,800
therapy medications they have

985
00:34:35,909 --> 00:34:34,560
almost like a nerve stimulator i've

986
00:34:38,550 --> 00:34:35,919
actually tried

987
00:34:39,270 --> 00:34:38,560
um putting that like on my temples and

988
00:34:43,510 --> 00:34:39,280
stuff

989
00:34:46,310 --> 00:34:43,520
and nothing really kind of stuck

990
00:34:46,950 --> 00:34:46,320
i just have been managing and dealing

991
00:34:51,109 --> 00:34:46,960
with it

992
00:34:53,030 --> 00:34:51,119
ever since um but i've noticed that

993
00:34:55,909 --> 00:34:53,040
you know there's things that i can kind

994
00:34:59,990 --> 00:34:55,919
of focus on now that'll really

995
00:35:02,069 --> 00:35:00,000
keep my mind off the perceived bad stuff

996
00:35:03,910 --> 00:35:02,079
well i'm happy to i'll send you an email

997
00:35:06,550 --> 00:35:03,920
that has a couple links to

998
00:35:07,430 --> 00:35:06,560
to this treatment amazing yeah that'd be

999
00:35:10,470 --> 00:35:07,440
great

1000
00:35:11,670 --> 00:35:10,480
it it it's a there's one form of

1001
00:35:13,670 --> 00:35:11,680
treatment where

1002
00:35:14,870 --> 00:35:13,680
they want you to kind of relive some of

1003
00:35:16,630 --> 00:35:14,880
the experiences

1004
00:35:18,230 --> 00:35:16,640
which but then there's another treatment

1005
00:35:19,109 --> 00:35:18,240
where apparently you don't have to

1006
00:35:21,190 --> 00:35:19,119
relive them which

1007
00:35:23,109 --> 00:35:21,200
theoretically is better to not have to

1008
00:35:24,790 --> 00:35:23,119
do that but the whole idea is

1009
00:35:26,630 --> 00:35:24,800
a left brain right brain thing and in

1010
00:35:27,990 --> 00:35:26,640
rem sleep you know how

1011
00:35:29,270 --> 00:35:28,000
rapid eye movement your eyes are going

1012
00:35:31,030 --> 00:35:29,280
like this in rem sleep well that's kind

1013
00:35:31,510 --> 00:35:31,040
of a resetting of the brain apparently

1014
00:35:33,670 --> 00:35:31,520
and that's

1015
00:35:34,710 --> 00:35:33,680
that's your best sleep and why you wake

1016
00:35:36,790 --> 00:35:34,720
up refreshed because

1017
00:35:37,750 --> 00:35:36,800
the brain has been reset well they use

1018
00:35:40,630 --> 00:35:37,760
that

1019
00:35:41,910 --> 00:35:40,640
uh to somehow kind of reset the brain as

1020
00:35:45,510 --> 00:35:41,920
far as memories and so on

1021
00:35:46,870 --> 00:35:45,520
of the trauma and um

1022
00:35:48,069 --> 00:35:46,880
from the couple interviews that i did it

1023
00:35:49,829 --> 00:35:48,079
sounded pretty amazing and very

1024
00:35:51,910 --> 00:35:49,839
effective

1025
00:35:53,430 --> 00:35:51,920
yeah that would be awesome i'd love to

1026
00:35:54,870 --> 00:35:53,440
look into that and try it and bring it

1027
00:35:56,550 --> 00:35:54,880
up to my doctors because that

1028
00:35:58,470 --> 00:35:56,560
sounds like something i'd be more than

1029
00:36:02,390 --> 00:35:58,480
willing to try cool

1030
00:36:03,990 --> 00:36:02,400
so ultimately after your four years

1031
00:36:05,430 --> 00:36:04,000
how much back to normal would you say

1032
00:36:07,829 --> 00:36:05,440
you were in other words how good was

1033
00:36:10,550 --> 00:36:07,839
your leg

1034
00:36:12,150 --> 00:36:10,560
my leg was great i'd still suffer from a

1035
00:36:13,190 --> 00:36:12,160
lot of smelling and soreness and even

1036
00:36:16,630 --> 00:36:13,200
today i do

1037
00:36:19,270 --> 00:36:16,640
um today though it's

1038
00:36:20,150 --> 00:36:19,280
the swellness will go away overnight um

1039
00:36:22,150 --> 00:36:20,160
but back then

1040
00:36:24,069 --> 00:36:22,160
swellness would stay for at least a week

1041
00:36:27,109 --> 00:36:24,079
or two um

1042
00:36:29,349 --> 00:36:27,119
and life was a lot different

1043
00:36:30,310 --> 00:36:29,359
uh before i deployed to afghanistan you

1044
00:36:33,030 --> 00:36:30,320
know i was

1045
00:36:35,030 --> 00:36:33,040
young happily married uh you know i come

1046
00:36:37,349 --> 00:36:35,040
back after getting wounded and

1047
00:36:38,870 --> 00:36:37,359
not months after i arrived or not long

1048
00:36:42,550 --> 00:36:38,880
after i arrived in the hospital

1049
00:36:45,030 --> 00:36:42,560
hospital bed my wife asked for a divorce

1050
00:36:46,790 --> 00:36:45,040
so that was uh my life was kind of

1051
00:36:49,750 --> 00:36:46,800
falling apart during that time

1052
00:36:50,470 --> 00:36:49,760
and i really started doing a lot of

1053
00:36:54,069 --> 00:36:50,480
drinking

1054
00:36:55,670 --> 00:36:54,079
a lot of tinkering tinkering around with

1055
00:36:56,630 --> 00:36:55,680
medications that i shouldn't have been

1056
00:36:59,109 --> 00:36:56,640
doing

1057
00:37:01,030 --> 00:36:59,119
and um you know just a lot of suicidal

1058
00:37:03,510 --> 00:37:01,040
thoughts and tendencies

1059
00:37:04,630 --> 00:37:03,520
and i really i really struggled with

1060
00:37:06,950 --> 00:37:04,640
that and

1061
00:37:08,470 --> 00:37:06,960
i tell people and this might surprise

1062
00:37:11,030 --> 00:37:08,480
some people but the divorce

1063
00:37:11,990 --> 00:37:11,040
actually hurt me more than the blast did

1064
00:37:13,430 --> 00:37:12,000
uh it just

1065
00:37:15,190 --> 00:37:13,440
you know that one person you thought you

1066
00:37:17,510 --> 00:37:15,200
could count on uh

1067
00:37:18,710 --> 00:37:17,520
you know that shoulder to lean on just

1068
00:37:20,150 --> 00:37:18,720
was gone

1069
00:37:22,150 --> 00:37:20,160
i mean she was physically there for a

1070
00:37:26,069 --> 00:37:22,160
little bit but then she was gone

1071
00:37:29,589 --> 00:37:26,079
and i struggled with that for years

1072
00:37:31,829 --> 00:37:29,599
and there was a moment after i had

1073
00:37:34,109 --> 00:37:31,839
gotten out of the military and this

1074
00:37:36,950 --> 00:37:34,119
would have been

1075
00:37:39,829 --> 00:37:36,960
2016 so three years uh

1076
00:37:40,950 --> 00:37:39,839
after i got out the military no not 2016

1077
00:37:44,790 --> 00:37:40,960
sorry

1078
00:37:46,950 --> 00:37:44,800
2010 is when we got divorced so 2013

1079
00:37:47,910 --> 00:37:46,960
uh is when i got medically retired and

1080
00:37:50,390 --> 00:37:47,920
then

1081
00:37:51,750 --> 00:37:50,400
um you know there was a moment in my

1082
00:37:54,950 --> 00:37:51,760
life where

1083
00:37:57,750 --> 00:37:54,960
uh just one day i was

1084
00:37:59,589 --> 00:37:57,760
hammered by 10 o'clock in the morning uh

1085
00:38:02,069 --> 00:37:59,599
continued drinking throughout the day

1086
00:38:03,990 --> 00:38:02,079
and was just really fed up with myself

1087
00:38:07,190 --> 00:38:04,000
fed up with my life fed up with the pain

1088
00:38:10,230 --> 00:38:07,200
and hurting and i contemplated

1089
00:38:11,990 --> 00:38:10,240
uh taking my own life i actually had my

1090
00:38:14,310 --> 00:38:12,000
handgun in my lap and i was sitting at

1091
00:38:16,710 --> 00:38:14,320
the edge of my bed with my two dogs

1092
00:38:18,470 --> 00:38:16,720
and i was seconds away from pulling the

1093
00:38:19,349 --> 00:38:18,480
trigger until i happen to look to my

1094
00:38:22,230 --> 00:38:19,359
left

1095
00:38:23,670 --> 00:38:22,240
and my sweet little girl asia if you

1096
00:38:26,550 --> 00:38:23,680
have dogs i mean

1097
00:38:27,750 --> 00:38:26,560
they it they always look happy but

1098
00:38:30,550 --> 00:38:27,760
whatever it was in her

1099
00:38:31,349 --> 00:38:30,560
eye really kind of snapped me out of it

1100
00:38:34,470 --> 00:38:31,359
and

1101
00:38:35,349 --> 00:38:34,480
i thought to myself that you know the

1102
00:38:37,270 --> 00:38:35,359
harsh reality

1103
00:38:38,870 --> 00:38:37,280
is if i would have taken my life nobody

1104
00:38:39,430 --> 00:38:38,880
would have known for at least a week or

1105
00:38:42,710 --> 00:38:39,440
two

1106
00:38:45,990 --> 00:38:42,720
to survive

1107
00:38:48,950 --> 00:38:46,000
um but then i thought about instead

1108
00:38:51,510 --> 00:38:48,960
of taking away my pain i'm creating a

1109
00:38:55,510 --> 00:38:51,520
lot more pain for a lot of other people

1110
00:38:59,349 --> 00:38:55,520
and that's the moment when my life

1111
00:39:02,069 --> 00:38:59,359
went back to where it is now um

1112
00:39:03,750 --> 00:39:02,079
you know i'm no longer look at all the

1113
00:39:05,670 --> 00:39:03,760
bad things that have happened or the

1114
00:39:08,550 --> 00:39:05,680
perceived bad things that have happened

1115
00:39:10,630 --> 00:39:08,560
as a curse um i look at them as a

1116
00:39:12,630 --> 00:39:10,640
blessing in disguise because

1117
00:39:14,310 --> 00:39:12,640
you know if i hadn't gotten medically

1118
00:39:17,510 --> 00:39:14,320
retired from the military

1119
00:39:19,430 --> 00:39:17,520
i honestly don't know where i'd be

1120
00:39:22,550 --> 00:39:19,440
if i hadn't gotten a divorce i wouldn't

1121
00:39:26,150 --> 00:39:22,560
have the wife i have now who's amazing

1122
00:39:26,550 --> 00:39:26,160
and i decided that i was going to try

1123
00:39:28,470 --> 00:39:26,560
and

1124
00:39:29,750 --> 00:39:28,480
accomplish something with my life aside

1125
00:39:32,470 --> 00:39:29,760
from just being a veteran

1126
00:39:34,069 --> 00:39:32,480
so i got into mountaineering yeah so so

1127
00:39:34,870 --> 00:39:34,079
that was kind of your rock bottom

1128
00:39:37,190 --> 00:39:34,880
obviously

1129
00:39:38,390 --> 00:39:37,200
and and asia your dog was there to save

1130
00:39:42,150 --> 00:39:38,400
your life

1131
00:39:43,670 --> 00:39:42,160
yes she was well amazing and

1132
00:39:45,190 --> 00:39:43,680
before you joined the military i mean

1133
00:39:48,310 --> 00:39:45,200
had you had any issues with

1134
00:39:51,510 --> 00:39:48,320
depression or or or drink or or

1135
00:39:54,950 --> 00:39:51,520
you know a drinking problem or anything

1136
00:39:58,470 --> 00:39:54,960
not necessarily no um

1137
00:40:01,190 --> 00:39:58,480
i think there's some and drinking

1138
00:40:03,109 --> 00:40:01,200
is kind of big in my family but there's

1139
00:40:03,510 --> 00:40:03,119
a couple individuals who struggle with

1140
00:40:07,270 --> 00:40:03,520
it

1141
00:40:10,309 --> 00:40:07,280
until after

1142
00:40:11,430 --> 00:40:10,319
iraq and that was pretty much my coping

1143
00:40:14,710 --> 00:40:11,440
mechanism from

1144
00:40:15,670 --> 00:40:14,720
2006 till i mean i still drink but

1145
00:40:18,390 --> 00:40:15,680
socially now

1146
00:40:20,390 --> 00:40:18,400
um but i don't use it as coping

1147
00:40:21,910 --> 00:40:20,400
mechanism anymore so

1148
00:40:23,430 --> 00:40:21,920
um and before we get into the

1149
00:40:25,510 --> 00:40:23,440
mountaineering

1150
00:40:27,270 --> 00:40:25,520
what is your bottom line advice to

1151
00:40:29,030 --> 00:40:27,280
veterans who have

1152
00:40:30,309 --> 00:40:29,040
you know find themselves in similar

1153
00:40:34,069 --> 00:40:30,319
circumstances to what

1154
00:40:35,270 --> 00:40:34,079
you were in you know it sounds very

1155
00:40:38,470 --> 00:40:35,280
cliche

1156
00:40:41,589 --> 00:40:38,480
to say this but hang in there we live

1157
00:40:43,829 --> 00:40:41,599
unfortunately in the society today where

1158
00:40:44,790 --> 00:40:43,839
we get instant gratification instant

1159
00:40:47,030 --> 00:40:44,800
fixes

1160
00:40:49,990 --> 00:40:47,040
and sometimes our bodies and minds just

1161
00:40:52,950 --> 00:40:50,000
don't respond that well to that

1162
00:40:54,470 --> 00:40:52,960
you know it took me four plus two years

1163
00:40:57,030 --> 00:40:54,480
to get over my ex-wife

1164
00:40:57,990 --> 00:40:57,040
uh it's taken my body four years to

1165
00:41:00,790 --> 00:40:58,000
recover from

1166
00:41:01,910 --> 00:41:00,800
trauma and uh we really just have to

1167
00:41:03,990 --> 00:41:01,920
hang in there and

1168
00:41:06,069 --> 00:41:04,000
never ever be afraid to ask for help

1169
00:41:07,589 --> 00:41:06,079
because there's a lot of people in this

1170
00:41:08,309 --> 00:41:07,599
world that are more than willing to help

1171
00:41:12,470 --> 00:41:08,319
you

1172
00:41:14,390 --> 00:41:12,480
and in any way possible and also

1173
00:41:15,670 --> 00:41:14,400
you have to have a goal in life that's

1174
00:41:18,550 --> 00:41:15,680
one thing i really

1175
00:41:20,710 --> 00:41:18,560
uh noticed about myself is i always have

1176
00:41:23,510 --> 00:41:20,720
to have something on the horizon

1177
00:41:25,430 --> 00:41:23,520
and um you know when you get whomped

1178
00:41:28,230 --> 00:41:25,440
upside the head by a baseball bat

1179
00:41:29,670 --> 00:41:28,240
metaphorically because it all happens to

1180
00:41:33,109 --> 00:41:29,680
one of us whether it be

1181
00:41:34,069 --> 00:41:33,119
financial issues divorces deaths in the

1182
00:41:36,870 --> 00:41:34,079
family stuff like

1183
00:41:38,230 --> 00:41:36,880
that it'll definitely set you back but

1184
00:41:39,829 --> 00:41:38,240
when you have

1185
00:41:41,589 --> 00:41:39,839
uh something on the horizon to look

1186
00:41:43,109 --> 00:41:41,599
forward to it makes things a little bit

1187
00:41:46,470 --> 00:41:43,119
easier

1188
00:41:48,309 --> 00:41:46,480
yeah and unfortunately suicide among

1189
00:41:51,750 --> 00:41:48,319
vets is a

1190
00:41:53,349 --> 00:41:51,760
way more common than it should be it is

1191
00:41:54,150 --> 00:41:53,359
and i noticed that with a few of my

1192
00:41:57,190 --> 00:41:54,160
friends who

1193
00:41:59,270 --> 00:41:57,200
struggle that i mean the va system is a

1194
00:42:00,069 --> 00:41:59,280
very good system overall or at least

1195
00:42:03,270 --> 00:42:00,079
i've had

1196
00:42:06,309 --> 00:42:03,280
great success with it um but i do notice

1197
00:42:08,550 --> 00:42:06,319
um that some of my friends have

1198
00:42:10,309 --> 00:42:08,560
uh they still have this military mindset

1199
00:42:12,870 --> 00:42:10,319
where they have to be

1200
00:42:14,069 --> 00:42:12,880
as tough as possible to the very last

1201
00:42:16,309 --> 00:42:14,079
point and that's

1202
00:42:17,829 --> 00:42:16,319
not a good way to be in the va system

1203
00:42:21,109 --> 00:42:17,839
because you're not going to get a

1204
00:42:23,270 --> 00:42:21,119
appointment for any issues anytime soon

1205
00:42:24,790 --> 00:42:23,280
so when the first sign of something's

1206
00:42:26,309 --> 00:42:24,800
going wrong you really

1207
00:42:28,790 --> 00:42:26,319
need to ask for help otherwise you're

1208
00:42:30,230 --> 00:42:28,800
going to be stuck in the system waiting

1209
00:42:32,230 --> 00:42:30,240
yeah well i think you know it's a very

1210
00:42:35,190 --> 00:42:32,240
good thing that ptsd is being

1211
00:42:36,550 --> 00:42:35,200
uh so much more recognized because

1212
00:42:37,990 --> 00:42:36,560
that's something in your head

1213
00:42:39,510 --> 00:42:38,000
and when you're supposed to be a tough

1214
00:42:40,710 --> 00:42:39,520
soldier you know to have something in

1215
00:42:41,510 --> 00:42:40,720
your head that's not something that

1216
00:42:44,069 --> 00:42:41,520
people like to

1217
00:42:44,550 --> 00:42:44,079
acknowledge but you know we know that it

1218
00:42:48,150 --> 00:42:44,560
is a

1219
00:42:51,270 --> 00:42:48,160
real injury as much as a physical injury

1220
00:42:54,309 --> 00:42:51,280
and um yeah it's just proven

1221
00:42:58,390 --> 00:42:54,319
it it is and i george bush

1222
00:43:00,150 --> 00:42:58,400
actually calls it pts he uh you know

1223
00:43:02,230 --> 00:43:00,160
because it's post traumatic stress it's

1224
00:43:06,230 --> 00:43:02,240
no longer disorder you can actually

1225
00:43:08,470 --> 00:43:06,240
heal it essentially and uh it's

1226
00:43:09,829 --> 00:43:08,480
pretty awesome to think that you know if

1227
00:43:19,430 --> 00:43:09,839
you

1228
00:43:21,109 --> 00:43:19,440
yeah i mean just to recognize that it's

1229
00:43:21,910 --> 00:43:21,119
simply human and and it would almost

1230
00:43:24,150 --> 00:43:21,920
frankly be

1231
00:43:25,030 --> 00:43:24,160
a little bit inhuman to not come back

1232
00:43:28,309 --> 00:43:25,040
from war

1233
00:43:30,550 --> 00:43:28,319
without pts yeah

1234
00:43:32,470 --> 00:43:30,560
and i i will say like my family and

1235
00:43:33,670 --> 00:43:32,480
friends have been a huge part of my

1236
00:43:36,390 --> 00:43:33,680
healing

1237
00:43:37,510 --> 00:43:36,400
they've always been like my foundation

1238
00:43:41,670 --> 00:43:37,520
and

1239
00:43:43,910 --> 00:43:41,680
every time they're at my side is like

1240
00:43:45,750 --> 00:43:43,920
an additional brick on that foundation

1241
00:43:49,030 --> 00:43:45,760
to build me up to who i am today

1242
00:43:51,030 --> 00:43:49,040
so i've been incredibly blessed to have

1243
00:43:52,069 --> 00:43:51,040
such amazing individuals in my life to

1244
00:43:54,870 --> 00:43:52,079
help

1245
00:43:55,910 --> 00:43:54,880
so you you embark on mountaineering and

1246
00:43:58,710 --> 00:43:55,920
according to

1247
00:43:59,270 --> 00:43:58,720
what i took off the internet your your

1248
00:44:05,910 --> 00:43:59,280
first

1249
00:44:07,510 --> 00:44:05,920
mountain that you summited of the seven

1250
00:44:11,829 --> 00:44:07,520
tallest of each continent

1251
00:44:14,470 --> 00:44:11,839
was in russia yeah that's right

1252
00:44:16,950 --> 00:44:14,480
yeah mount elbrus in russia it's uh

1253
00:44:19,589 --> 00:44:16,960
august 1st 2014

1254
00:44:21,109 --> 00:44:19,599
which would have been approximately a

1255
00:44:24,230 --> 00:44:21,119
little less than

1256
00:44:27,589 --> 00:44:24,240
a year after your recovery right yeah

1257
00:44:29,990 --> 00:44:27,599
yeah it was unfortunately

1258
00:44:31,910 --> 00:44:30,000
that wasn't the first mountain i tried i

1259
00:44:35,030 --> 00:44:31,920
actually tried mount baker and mount

1260
00:44:36,950 --> 00:44:35,040
rainier in washington state and i didn't

1261
00:44:40,710 --> 00:44:36,960
reach the summit of either mountain

1262
00:44:42,870 --> 00:44:40,720
and i honestly started

1263
00:44:44,710 --> 00:44:42,880
to get that feeling of failure uh you

1264
00:44:46,470 --> 00:44:44,720
know i say that because i felt like i

1265
00:44:47,910 --> 00:44:46,480
failed in my military career even though

1266
00:44:49,829 --> 00:44:47,920
that was out of my control

1267
00:44:51,510 --> 00:44:49,839
i felt like i failed in my marriage with

1268
00:44:53,589 --> 00:44:51,520
the divorce even though that was

1269
00:44:55,750 --> 00:44:53,599
really not my choice but this was

1270
00:44:57,829 --> 00:44:55,760
something that i really wanted to try

1271
00:44:59,349 --> 00:44:57,839
and not reaching the summit of either of

1272
00:45:01,990 --> 00:44:59,359
those mountains was

1273
00:45:02,950 --> 00:45:02,000
kind of demoralizing at first until my

1274
00:45:04,390 --> 00:45:02,960
guide

1275
00:45:06,470 --> 00:45:04,400
who's become one of my really good

1276
00:45:08,790 --> 00:45:06,480
friends dennis he

1277
00:45:09,670 --> 00:45:08,800
saw what me being in the outdoors was

1278
00:45:13,030 --> 00:45:09,680
doing

1279
00:45:16,550 --> 00:45:13,040
for my mental health and physical health

1280
00:45:18,150 --> 00:45:16,560
he saw how much i was smiling how much i

1281
00:45:20,150 --> 00:45:18,160
enjoyed being out there and

1282
00:45:21,430 --> 00:45:20,160
how i was actually embracing the

1283
00:45:23,109 --> 00:45:21,440
challenge

1284
00:45:25,430 --> 00:45:23,119
because it definitely hurt i was still

1285
00:45:26,470 --> 00:45:25,440
pretty soon after i was fully recovered

1286
00:45:28,390 --> 00:45:26,480
but

1287
00:45:29,990 --> 00:45:28,400
i still had a lot of issues with

1288
00:45:32,470 --> 00:45:30,000
swelling and pain

1289
00:45:34,150 --> 00:45:32,480
but um he pretty much pulled me aside

1290
00:45:36,390 --> 00:45:34,160
and saw

1291
00:45:38,309 --> 00:45:36,400
told me what he was seeing in me and he

1292
00:45:38,950 --> 00:45:38,319
told me to stick with it and reminded me

1293
00:45:40,630 --> 00:45:38,960
that

1294
00:45:42,630 --> 00:45:40,640
uh sometimes the most successful

1295
00:45:45,670 --> 00:45:42,640
mountaineers uh don't summit

1296
00:45:48,710 --> 00:45:45,680
as many mountains as they uh plan

1297
00:45:51,030 --> 00:45:48,720
so i stuck with it and he gave me the

1298
00:45:52,790 --> 00:45:51,040
opportunity to join a team to go climb

1299
00:45:55,270 --> 00:45:52,800
out albers in russia

1300
00:45:56,710 --> 00:45:55,280
and i honestly had never even heard of

1301
00:45:59,990 --> 00:45:56,720
this mountain before

1302
00:46:01,829 --> 00:46:00,000
uh google search yeah it's amazing

1303
00:46:03,349 --> 00:46:01,839
i google searched it and i saw it was an

1304
00:46:06,390 --> 00:46:03,359
18 000 foot summit

1305
00:46:08,710 --> 00:46:06,400
i'm like oh boy uh

1306
00:46:10,950 --> 00:46:08,720
you know mount baker is only 10 000 feet

1307
00:46:12,470 --> 00:46:10,960
mount rainier is 14 000 feet so now i'm

1308
00:46:13,990 --> 00:46:12,480
kind of thinking what the hell did i get

1309
00:46:17,990 --> 00:46:14,000
myself into

1310
00:46:19,750 --> 00:46:18,000
um but yeah august 1st 2014 i reached

1311
00:46:21,510 --> 00:46:19,760
the summit of mount alberous

1312
00:46:23,030 --> 00:46:21,520
and it was obviously higher than the

1313
00:46:25,510 --> 00:46:23,040
alps i mean you don't really

1314
00:46:28,630 --> 00:46:25,520
again you know when you i this being the

1315
00:46:30,790 --> 00:46:28,640
tall summit i guess in europe um

1316
00:46:31,910 --> 00:46:30,800
you know you would have guessed the alps

1317
00:46:35,750 --> 00:46:31,920
yeah

1318
00:46:41,270 --> 00:46:35,760
um

1319
00:46:42,790 --> 00:46:41,280
google search i found out it was one of

1320
00:46:43,750 --> 00:46:42,800
the seven summits that was pretty

1321
00:46:46,710 --> 00:46:43,760
awesome

1322
00:46:48,710 --> 00:46:46,720
um but actually probably the one thing

1323
00:46:49,510 --> 00:46:48,720
that really stuck with me on this climb

1324
00:46:51,750 --> 00:46:49,520
was

1325
00:46:54,790 --> 00:46:51,760
you know for the four years after my

1326
00:46:57,670 --> 00:46:54,800
divorce i'd carry around my wedding ring

1327
00:46:59,750 --> 00:46:57,680
just as kind of hope uh that my ex-wife

1328
00:47:01,430 --> 00:46:59,760
would come back to me like if i

1329
00:47:03,109 --> 00:47:01,440
climb these big tall mountains i'll

1330
00:47:04,630 --> 00:47:03,119
prove how worthy i am and she'll come

1331
00:47:06,550 --> 00:47:04,640
back to me sort of thing

1332
00:47:09,030 --> 00:47:06,560
and i can laugh about it now but at the

1333
00:47:11,510 --> 00:47:09,040
time it was something that i really

1334
00:47:13,349 --> 00:47:11,520
thought of and i actually had that ring

1335
00:47:16,470 --> 00:47:13,359
with me on the summit

1336
00:47:18,710 --> 00:47:16,480
and um it's amazing what that little

1337
00:47:20,950 --> 00:47:18,720
thing so cylindrical thing that weighed

1338
00:47:22,870 --> 00:47:20,960
less than an ounce could do to someone

1339
00:47:24,200 --> 00:47:22,880
and i actually chucked it off the

1340
00:47:26,069 --> 00:47:24,210
mountain in russia

1341
00:47:28,710 --> 00:47:26,079
[Laughter]

1342
00:47:30,390 --> 00:47:28,720
yeah you checked it off the summit i did

1343
00:47:32,870 --> 00:47:30,400
i did so it's somewhere in between the

1344
00:47:35,670 --> 00:47:32,880
border of russia and georgia

1345
00:47:36,470 --> 00:47:35,680
so but but you brought it with you

1346
00:47:39,109 --> 00:47:36,480
thinking

1347
00:47:40,549 --> 00:47:39,119
that without the intention of chucking

1348
00:47:43,349 --> 00:47:40,559
it off the summit

1349
00:47:45,190 --> 00:47:43,359
not at all i just brought it with me i

1350
00:47:48,630 --> 00:47:45,200
thought it was my little good luck charm

1351
00:47:50,829 --> 00:47:48,640
sort of thing and uh you know

1352
00:47:53,589 --> 00:47:50,839
thinking back at it now it's funny

1353
00:47:54,630 --> 00:47:53,599
because i look at this mountaineering

1354
00:47:57,109 --> 00:47:54,640
journey and

1355
00:47:58,710 --> 00:47:57,119
i was i started it because of her uh you

1356
00:48:01,349 --> 00:47:58,720
know i wanted to claim

1357
00:48:02,390 --> 00:48:01,359
mount everest to prove how tough i was

1358
00:48:04,870 --> 00:48:02,400
and

1359
00:48:05,670 --> 00:48:04,880
i i give some of the credit to her

1360
00:48:08,870 --> 00:48:05,680
because

1361
00:48:10,470 --> 00:48:08,880
she got me into this and now after i let

1362
00:48:14,069 --> 00:48:10,480
that ring fly off my

1363
00:48:15,990 --> 00:48:14,079
uh off the summit i found that it was

1364
00:48:17,109 --> 00:48:16,000
the weight of the world was no longer

1365
00:48:19,990 --> 00:48:17,119
holding me back

1366
00:48:21,910 --> 00:48:20,000
um you know i wasn't climbing for her

1367
00:48:23,430 --> 00:48:21,920
anymore i was climbing for me

1368
00:48:25,670 --> 00:48:23,440
and that's when i really fell in love

1369
00:48:27,109 --> 00:48:25,680
with it i it mountaineering became my

1370
00:48:31,030 --> 00:48:27,119
drug the mountains are

1371
00:48:33,349 --> 00:48:31,040
my truck so i i decided to stick with it

1372
00:48:35,589 --> 00:48:33,359
and a couple months later i got the

1373
00:48:38,630 --> 00:48:35,599
opportunity to go to mount kilimanjaro

1374
00:48:40,710 --> 00:48:38,640
in uh tanzania and uh

1375
00:48:42,950 --> 00:48:40,720
unfortunately i ended up getting sick on

1376
00:48:46,390 --> 00:48:42,960
that mountain after a couple days

1377
00:48:47,030 --> 00:48:46,400
um but i wasn't tough on myself about it

1378
00:49:03,589 --> 00:48:47,040
i

1379
00:49:05,750 --> 00:49:03,599
ended up

1380
00:49:07,589 --> 00:49:05,760
just basically saying i'll come back and

1381
00:49:09,190 --> 00:49:07,599
try again some other day

1382
00:49:11,030 --> 00:49:09,200
so i didn't have that feeling of failure

1383
00:49:12,790 --> 00:49:11,040
which was awesome it was just

1384
00:49:14,150 --> 00:49:12,800
uh something that happens but but on

1385
00:49:17,510 --> 00:49:14,160
that same trip

1386
00:49:21,430 --> 00:49:17,520
you then attempted it a second time and

1387
00:49:23,349 --> 00:49:21,440
got to the summit no no no i actually uh

1388
00:49:24,910 --> 00:49:23,359
i actually went to mount everest after

1389
00:49:27,829 --> 00:49:24,920
that in uh april

1390
00:49:28,790 --> 00:49:27,839
2015 and uh that was through the south

1391
00:49:32,069 --> 00:49:28,800
route so you do the

1392
00:49:35,750 --> 00:49:32,079
nine-day trek uh from luckily airport

1393
00:49:38,710 --> 00:49:35,760
into everest base camp and that feeling

1394
00:49:40,870 --> 00:49:38,720
of being in the himalaya is a truly it

1395
00:49:41,589 --> 00:49:40,880
was truly a dream for me just to be able

1396
00:49:44,710 --> 00:49:41,599
to

1397
00:49:46,549 --> 00:49:44,720
that tracking

1398
00:49:49,510 --> 00:49:46,559
so we're about to talk about your your

1399
00:49:52,710 --> 00:49:49,520
climb to the top of everest

1400
00:49:56,870 --> 00:49:52,720
um the attempt this is the attempt okay

1401
00:49:59,589 --> 00:49:56,880
okay yeah um

1402
00:50:00,470 --> 00:49:59,599
so you went there you but you went there

1403
00:50:02,790 --> 00:50:00,480
with the

1404
00:50:04,150 --> 00:50:02,800
plan that i'm going to climb everest i'm

1405
00:50:07,349 --> 00:50:04,160
going to summit everest

1406
00:50:08,230 --> 00:50:07,359
and this is in 2015. right so it's just

1407
00:50:11,349 --> 00:50:08,240
a year after

1408
00:50:13,190 --> 00:50:11,359
uh and you're part of an expedition and

1409
00:50:14,390 --> 00:50:13,200
by the way these things are not cheap

1410
00:50:16,309 --> 00:50:14,400
right so i mean

1411
00:50:18,710 --> 00:50:16,319
they are not were you you were paying

1412
00:50:21,910 --> 00:50:18,720
for this out of your own pocket or what

1413
00:50:23,430 --> 00:50:21,920
i actually paid for uh mount elbrus i

1414
00:50:25,829 --> 00:50:23,440
completely drained my bank account to

1415
00:50:26,230 --> 00:50:25,839
pay it and i say that as a young stupid

1416
00:50:28,150 --> 00:50:26,240
kid

1417
00:50:29,990 --> 00:50:28,160
at the time who only had like five grand

1418
00:50:32,630 --> 00:50:30,000
in his bank account anyways

1419
00:50:34,710 --> 00:50:32,640
so i actually bought all my gear drained

1420
00:50:37,430 --> 00:50:34,720
my bank account bought the flights

1421
00:50:38,950 --> 00:50:37,440
uh summited that mountain and i was like

1422
00:50:41,109 --> 00:50:38,960
well let's keep this rolling

1423
00:50:42,549 --> 00:50:41,119
and you know social media is an

1424
00:50:43,750 --> 00:50:42,559
incredible thing when used for all the

1425
00:50:45,270 --> 00:50:43,760
right reasons

1426
00:50:46,870 --> 00:50:45,280
um when i first got on this

1427
00:50:50,069 --> 00:50:46,880
mountaineering thing i'd

1428
00:50:52,230 --> 00:50:50,079
google search every famous mountaineer

1429
00:50:54,390 --> 00:50:52,240
ever and trying to basically facebook

1430
00:50:56,549 --> 00:50:54,400
stalk them and find them and

1431
00:50:58,309 --> 00:50:56,559
i had friend requests them asked them

1432
00:51:01,190 --> 00:50:58,319
questions through messenger

1433
00:51:02,710 --> 00:51:01,200
and uh anyone that looked like they were

1434
00:51:04,309 --> 00:51:02,720
a mountaineer i pretty much friend

1435
00:51:07,670 --> 00:51:04,319
requested it was pretty

1436
00:51:10,150 --> 00:51:07,680
creepy thinking about it now but um

1437
00:51:12,069 --> 00:51:10,160
by the grace of god uh these three

1438
00:51:13,030 --> 00:51:12,079
individuals from new zealand out of all

1439
00:51:16,549 --> 00:51:13,040
places

1440
00:51:19,910 --> 00:51:16,559
uh were heard my story

1441
00:51:21,990 --> 00:51:19,920
um they saw what my goal was and

1442
00:51:23,910 --> 00:51:22,000
they wanted to be a part of that so they

1443
00:51:26,470 --> 00:51:23,920
sponsored me for

1444
00:51:27,990 --> 00:51:26,480
uh pretty much the rest of my climbs and

1445
00:51:29,190 --> 00:51:28,000
uh will you say what your goal was was

1446
00:51:31,589 --> 00:51:29,200
that to climb everest

1447
00:51:33,349 --> 00:51:31,599
or to climb all seven initially it was

1448
00:51:35,829 --> 00:51:33,359
just to climb everest

1449
00:51:37,430 --> 00:51:35,839
and then it grew into the seven once uh

1450
00:51:40,230 --> 00:51:37,440
things started really rolling

1451
00:51:41,270 --> 00:51:40,240
gotcha so they supported you you became

1452
00:51:44,630 --> 00:51:41,280
part of their group

1453
00:51:44,950 --> 00:51:44,640
in climbing everest yeah they supported

1454
00:51:47,349 --> 00:51:44,960
me

1455
00:51:49,430 --> 00:51:47,359
uh they were climbers themselves but not

1456
00:51:52,630 --> 00:51:49,440
uh big mountain climbers

1457
00:51:55,750 --> 00:51:52,640
so they actually didn't come with me

1458
00:51:58,309 --> 00:51:55,760
on any of these trips until i went to

1459
00:51:58,790 --> 00:51:58,319
a certain mountain which i'll get to but

1460
00:52:02,150 --> 00:51:58,800
uh

1461
00:52:05,030 --> 00:52:02,160
yeah everest in 2015 was an incredible

1462
00:52:08,150 --> 00:52:05,040
experience i was there for

1463
00:52:10,870 --> 00:52:08,160
two and a half weeks until um you know

1464
00:52:11,510 --> 00:52:10,880
april 25th happened in 2015 when the

1465
00:52:14,870 --> 00:52:11,520
earthquake

1466
00:52:17,990 --> 00:52:14,880
shook all of nepal and kathmandu

1467
00:52:22,069 --> 00:52:18,000
and i was pretty much when my dream

1468
00:52:23,589 --> 00:52:22,079
ended and i was super

1469
00:52:25,430 --> 00:52:23,599
this sounds really selfish but i was

1470
00:52:28,549 --> 00:52:25,440
super bummed about that knowing that

1471
00:52:31,349 --> 00:52:28,559
my dream was ending at that moment but

1472
00:52:32,950 --> 00:52:31,359
you know being caught in an avalanche

1473
00:52:35,109 --> 00:52:32,960
after an earthquake

1474
00:52:38,069 --> 00:52:35,119
uh from a cerak breaking off of mount

1475
00:52:41,589 --> 00:52:38,079
mori directly across from everest was

1476
00:52:43,190 --> 00:52:41,599
uh now i kind of went up myself it was

1477
00:52:43,990 --> 00:52:43,200
definitely the most terrifying thing i

1478
00:52:47,270 --> 00:52:44,000
wanted

1479
00:52:50,309 --> 00:52:47,280
i experienced um

1480
00:52:52,950 --> 00:52:50,319
i was actually coming down from camp one

1481
00:52:54,790 --> 00:52:52,960
making my way through the kumbu ice fall

1482
00:52:56,630 --> 00:52:54,800
and we had just gotten to the base of

1483
00:52:57,510 --> 00:52:56,640
the ice ball we're walking towards base

1484
00:52:59,349 --> 00:52:57,520
camp

1485
00:53:00,870 --> 00:52:59,359
and uh that's when the earthquake

1486
00:53:01,910 --> 00:53:00,880
happened and i really didn't think too

1487
00:53:04,390 --> 00:53:01,920
much of it

1488
00:53:06,309 --> 00:53:04,400
um you know we were on the mountain for

1489
00:53:08,230 --> 00:53:06,319
two weeks of two plus weeks already at

1490
00:53:09,670 --> 00:53:08,240
this moment going up and down

1491
00:53:11,270 --> 00:53:09,680
so i just kind of you're going up and

1492
00:53:14,870 --> 00:53:11,280
down to acclimate

1493
00:53:17,750 --> 00:53:14,880
to the elevation exactly exactly

1494
00:53:19,270 --> 00:53:17,760
and you know with my disability i just

1495
00:53:20,790 --> 00:53:19,280
kind of thought my legs were a little

1496
00:53:23,270 --> 00:53:20,800
shaky i was a little tired

1497
00:53:24,549 --> 00:53:23,280
uh they were wobbling and then it got a

1498
00:53:26,230 --> 00:53:24,559
little more intense and i

1499
00:53:29,190 --> 00:53:26,240
just happened to look down at the ground

1500
00:53:31,349 --> 00:53:29,200
and i saw these rocks start shifting

1501
00:53:35,510 --> 00:53:31,359
and then my climbing partner and sherpa

1502
00:53:37,030 --> 00:53:35,520
perba he goes earthquake and i'm like

1503
00:53:38,710 --> 00:53:37,040
like i thought he was kidding i really

1504
00:53:41,750 --> 00:53:38,720
did right and he's like no

1505
00:53:43,670 --> 00:53:41,760
earthquake like i'm like all right i'm

1506
00:53:45,349 --> 00:53:43,680
starting to believe you a little bit now

1507
00:53:47,510 --> 00:53:45,359
because i started hearing like little

1508
00:53:49,990 --> 00:53:47,520
avalanches go off around us

1509
00:53:51,190 --> 00:53:50,000
and uh saw even the rocks shift even

1510
00:53:53,589 --> 00:53:51,200
more and

1511
00:53:54,710 --> 00:53:53,599
uh he kind of not necessarily started

1512
00:53:57,349 --> 00:53:54,720
running away

1513
00:53:58,390 --> 00:53:57,359
but he kind of started walking in a fast

1514
00:54:00,870 --> 00:53:58,400
pace away from

1515
00:54:02,230 --> 00:54:00,880
the uh ice fall because the kumbo ice

1516
00:54:03,910 --> 00:54:02,240
fall is the most dangerous part of

1517
00:54:06,230 --> 00:54:03,920
everest on the south side

1518
00:54:07,430 --> 00:54:06,240
it's just these huge ice blocks as big

1519
00:54:10,870 --> 00:54:07,440
as buildings that could come

1520
00:54:12,710 --> 00:54:10,880
toppling down and um when he started

1521
00:54:15,109 --> 00:54:12,720
high tailing it away from theirs

1522
00:54:16,549 --> 00:54:15,119
that's when i started uh taking it

1523
00:54:18,710 --> 00:54:16,559
pretty serious and

1524
00:54:20,309 --> 00:54:18,720
this day and age everyone has a gopro or

1525
00:54:22,630 --> 00:54:20,319
a camera of some sorts

1526
00:54:24,390 --> 00:54:22,640
and i actually had one on my helmet and

1527
00:54:28,069 --> 00:54:24,400
uh flipped that bad boy

1528
00:54:29,190 --> 00:54:28,079
on uh and a part of me was hoping to get

1529
00:54:32,630 --> 00:54:29,200
youtube famous

1530
00:54:34,549 --> 00:54:32,640
uh i only have 25 000 views now but uh

1531
00:54:35,750 --> 00:54:34,559
and i haven't seen a dime from youtube

1532
00:54:40,630 --> 00:54:35,760
so that didn't work

1533
00:54:43,430 --> 00:54:40,640
um but also it was kind of

1534
00:54:46,069 --> 00:54:43,440
it was obviously to catch what was going

1535
00:54:48,309 --> 00:54:46,079
on but it was more for my family

1536
00:54:50,309 --> 00:54:48,319
as comfort knowing that i wasn't alone

1537
00:54:52,390 --> 00:54:50,319
if i were to die

1538
00:54:54,309 --> 00:54:52,400
but my climbing partner and i were very

1539
00:54:55,589 --> 00:54:54,319
very lucky we caught the very tail end

1540
00:54:58,630 --> 00:54:55,599
of the avalanche and only

1541
00:55:02,150 --> 00:54:58,640
got a little bit of a dusting over us

1542
00:55:04,870 --> 00:55:02,160
and uh because how many people died

1543
00:55:07,270 --> 00:55:04,880
uh at base camp there's been conflicting

1544
00:55:08,549 --> 00:55:07,280
reports i've heard anywhere between 18

1545
00:55:12,230 --> 00:55:08,559
to 21

1546
00:55:14,950 --> 00:55:12,240
um i think it's 20 um but i

1547
00:55:16,710 --> 00:55:14,960
can't be too sure that um there was

1548
00:55:19,750 --> 00:55:16,720
another

1549
00:55:20,390 --> 00:55:19,760
the kumbu ice fall crashing and sliding

1550
00:55:22,789 --> 00:55:20,400
down

1551
00:55:23,589 --> 00:55:22,799
over to base camp is that what happened

1552
00:55:25,349 --> 00:55:23,599
it was

1553
00:55:27,430 --> 00:55:25,359
actually from the opposite side of

1554
00:55:28,069 --> 00:55:27,440
everest it was from uh mount pumauri

1555
00:55:29,750 --> 00:55:28,079
which is

1556
00:55:32,150 --> 00:55:29,760
directly across from everest on the

1557
00:55:33,829 --> 00:55:32,160
other side uh

1558
00:55:35,670 --> 00:55:33,839
between base camp so it'd be like

1559
00:55:36,390 --> 00:55:35,680
everest base camp and then another

1560
00:55:39,670 --> 00:55:36,400
mountain mount

1561
00:55:43,750 --> 00:55:39,680
mori and a big

1562
00:55:47,750 --> 00:55:43,760
basically football field uh snowfall

1563
00:55:51,030 --> 00:55:47,760
broke off or not a snowfall

1564
00:55:53,829 --> 00:55:51,040
football field size ice surak just

1565
00:55:55,589 --> 00:55:53,839
came tumbling down from pumari and went

1566
00:55:57,270 --> 00:55:55,599
through the midsection of base camp

1567
00:55:59,510 --> 00:55:57,280
towards the kumble ice fall where we

1568
00:56:01,109 --> 00:55:59,520
were and um

1569
00:56:03,270 --> 00:56:01,119
yeah we caught the tail end of it

1570
00:56:05,349 --> 00:56:03,280
unfortunately there were 100 plus

1571
00:56:08,470 --> 00:56:05,359
wounded at base camp and another

1572
00:56:09,990 --> 00:56:08,480
i'd say 20 that died but more

1573
00:56:12,069 --> 00:56:10,000
traumatically is what happened to that

1574
00:56:14,950 --> 00:56:12,079
country because that was

1575
00:56:16,230 --> 00:56:14,960
that was devastating to see after i got

1576
00:56:19,589 --> 00:56:16,240
off the mountain

1577
00:56:22,309 --> 00:56:19,599
just seeing all these people that lost

1578
00:56:24,150 --> 00:56:22,319
their homes and family members and

1579
00:56:25,349 --> 00:56:24,160
unfortunately the nepali government is

1580
00:56:28,309 --> 00:56:25,359
very corrupt so

1581
00:56:29,990 --> 00:56:28,319
they know that there's really no hope

1582
00:56:32,309 --> 00:56:30,000
from their government to help them out

1583
00:56:33,750 --> 00:56:32,319
so it was very very hard to see that on

1584
00:56:35,910 --> 00:56:33,760
my way out

1585
00:56:37,349 --> 00:56:35,920
and was that the end of the climbing for

1586
00:56:39,510 --> 00:56:37,359
that season

1587
00:56:40,470 --> 00:56:39,520
it was that ended the climbing season

1588
00:56:42,870 --> 00:56:40,480
for everyone

1589
00:56:45,270 --> 00:56:42,880
and one of my big regrets is actually

1590
00:56:46,789 --> 00:56:45,280
not staying for the time i was supposed

1591
00:56:48,230 --> 00:56:46,799
to be there just kind of helping out

1592
00:56:49,910 --> 00:56:48,240
throughout the country

1593
00:56:51,270 --> 00:56:49,920
uh that was one of one of my bigger

1594
00:56:54,470 --> 00:56:51,280
regrets in life but

1595
00:56:57,270 --> 00:56:54,480
uh yeah it was just

1596
00:56:59,030 --> 00:56:57,280
that that was i really had to dig deep

1597
00:56:59,829 --> 00:56:59,040
and think about what i was doing with my

1598
00:57:02,630 --> 00:56:59,839
life if i really

1599
00:57:04,950 --> 00:57:02,640
wanted to achieve this goal and i took a

1600
00:57:08,069 --> 00:57:04,960
good year off of climbing because

1601
00:57:09,430 --> 00:57:08,079
i was shook i i really didn't know if i

1602
00:57:13,109 --> 00:57:09,440
wanted to stick with this

1603
00:57:14,309 --> 00:57:13,119
and i decided that i did so i went back

1604
00:57:18,230 --> 00:57:14,319
to uh

1605
00:57:21,349 --> 00:57:18,240
mount kilimanjaro in 2017 and i summited

1606
00:57:22,950 --> 00:57:21,359
in february with a group of 17 other

1607
00:57:26,150 --> 00:57:22,960
individuals who

1608
00:57:27,510 --> 00:57:26,160
uh supported me on that climb just being

1609
00:57:30,069 --> 00:57:27,520
there with me and getting me back

1610
00:57:31,990 --> 00:57:30,079
on that climbing train so that was very

1611
00:57:32,390 --> 00:57:32,000
special and that became my second of the

1612
00:57:35,750 --> 00:57:32,400
seven

1613
00:57:36,230 --> 00:57:35,760
summits and then just a couple months

1614
00:57:38,789 --> 00:57:36,240
later

1615
00:57:40,309 --> 00:57:38,799
you're back in everest yeah a couple

1616
00:57:43,030 --> 00:57:40,319
months later uh

1617
00:57:43,910 --> 00:57:43,040
2017 was a great year for me is that is

1618
00:57:45,430 --> 00:57:43,920
that unusual

1619
00:57:47,990 --> 00:57:45,440
because i'm i'm not an expert in

1620
00:57:48,630 --> 00:57:48,000
climbers climbing but i'm fascinated by

1621
00:57:50,470 --> 00:57:48,640
it and i read

1622
00:57:52,150 --> 00:57:50,480
into thin air i assume you've read into

1623
00:57:57,190 --> 00:57:52,160
thin air oh yes

1624
00:58:02,630 --> 00:58:00,789
yeah yeah so that that made that

1625
00:58:04,630 --> 00:58:02,640
caused me to get really interested in in

1626
00:58:07,430 --> 00:58:04,640
all of it but how is that

1627
00:58:07,990 --> 00:58:07,440
uncommon to do two big summits like that

1628
00:58:11,109 --> 00:58:08,000
within a couple

1629
00:58:14,470 --> 00:58:11,119
months it is

1630
00:58:16,230 --> 00:58:14,480
it is um more so doing like everest

1631
00:58:18,230 --> 00:58:16,240
right after kilimanjaro is probably the

1632
00:58:20,150 --> 00:58:18,240
least uncommon thing

1633
00:58:21,910 --> 00:58:20,160
a lot of people tend to save everest as

1634
00:58:23,990 --> 00:58:21,920
their last of the summits or one of the

1635
00:58:26,710 --> 00:58:24,000
last

1636
00:58:27,430 --> 00:58:26,720
but i was in a point in my life where i

1637
00:58:30,870 --> 00:58:27,440
was in

1638
00:58:31,829 --> 00:58:30,880
really good shape and with the help of

1639
00:58:35,670 --> 00:58:31,839
my sponsors

1640
00:58:37,910 --> 00:58:35,680
and the individual my climbing partner

1641
00:58:41,030 --> 00:58:37,920
shearing dorje

1642
00:58:42,069 --> 00:58:41,040
who summoned it over 16 times now on may

1643
00:58:43,750 --> 00:58:42,079
22nd

1644
00:58:45,510 --> 00:58:43,760
via the north road so i went through

1645
00:58:47,670 --> 00:58:45,520
china and tibet

1646
00:58:48,789 --> 00:58:47,680
i summoned it at 8 20 in the morning

1647
00:58:50,150 --> 00:58:48,799
becoming the third

1648
00:58:53,030 --> 00:58:50,160
purple artists have been to reach the

1649
00:58:57,190 --> 00:58:53,040
summit of everest wow

1650
00:59:00,390 --> 00:58:57,200
amazing only the third

1651
00:59:00,789 --> 00:59:00,400
to ever summit everest huh yeah the

1652
00:59:03,030 --> 00:59:00,799
third

1653
00:59:05,030 --> 00:59:03,040
and as far as i know the last one to do

1654
00:59:07,430 --> 00:59:05,040
it um

1655
00:59:08,470 --> 00:59:07,440
which is unfortunate because i really

1656
00:59:11,430 --> 00:59:08,480
want to try and get

1657
00:59:12,870 --> 00:59:11,440
uh the first female kerbat recipient to

1658
00:59:15,270 --> 00:59:12,880
the summit of everest hopefully in the

1659
00:59:17,589 --> 00:59:15,280
next couple years

1660
00:59:19,270 --> 00:59:17,599
and are you the first to have summoned

1661
00:59:21,510 --> 00:59:19,280
at all seven then

1662
00:59:23,589 --> 00:59:21,520
i am yeah the first combat wounded and

1663
00:59:24,950 --> 00:59:23,599
purple recipient to summon all seven

1664
00:59:27,670 --> 00:59:24,960
summons

1665
00:59:28,390 --> 00:59:27,680
and that feat was as we were talking

1666
00:59:31,510 --> 00:59:28,400
about the other day

1667
00:59:34,870 --> 00:59:31,520
just completed last month yeah

1668
00:59:35,829 --> 00:59:34,880
june 13th uh my second attempt on denali

1669
00:59:38,870 --> 00:59:35,839
to finish the seven

1670
00:59:39,910 --> 00:59:38,880
summits uh i went in 2019 the first

1671
00:59:43,589 --> 00:59:39,920
attempt

1672
00:59:45,109 --> 00:59:43,599
and uh you know the mountain and weather

1673
00:59:47,829 --> 00:59:45,119
had a different plan for us

1674
00:59:49,589 --> 00:59:47,839
unfortunately so we i didn't get to the

1675
00:59:51,910 --> 00:59:49,599
summit that year

1676
00:59:53,030 --> 00:59:51,920
last year everything was called off due

1677
00:59:56,390 --> 00:59:53,040
to covid

1678
00:59:58,549 --> 00:59:56,400
and i left myself zero doubt during that

1679
01:00:00,710 --> 00:59:58,559
year and a half span to get myself into

1680
01:00:03,190 --> 01:00:00,720
shape and uh

1681
01:00:04,950 --> 01:00:03,200
we were blessed with such an amazing

1682
01:00:07,829 --> 01:00:04,960
team and great weather

1683
01:00:09,589 --> 01:00:07,839
and reached the summit on june 13th for

1684
01:00:11,750 --> 01:00:09,599
the seventh of my summits

1685
01:00:13,829 --> 01:00:11,760
and did you have the same guys kind of

1686
01:00:15,910 --> 01:00:13,839
sponsoring you or

1687
01:00:17,670 --> 01:00:15,920
yeah same same individuals from new

1688
01:00:20,069 --> 01:00:17,680
zealand were sponsoring me

1689
01:00:21,750 --> 01:00:20,079
uh i've been supported also by a

1690
01:00:22,950 --> 01:00:21,760
non-profit that i'm a volunteer and

1691
01:00:26,630 --> 01:00:22,960
mentor for

1692
01:00:30,069 --> 01:00:26,640
called uh one team colgan foundation

1693
01:00:32,950 --> 01:00:30,079
it was actually called american 300 and

1694
01:00:34,630 --> 01:00:32,960
they decided at the wrong time to start

1695
01:00:36,390 --> 01:00:34,640
switching names because it's caused a

1696
01:00:37,430 --> 01:00:36,400
lot of confusion lately in the past

1697
01:00:41,190 --> 01:00:37,440
month

1698
01:00:44,789 --> 01:00:41,200
but um yeah what's the name

1699
01:00:48,549 --> 01:00:44,799
one team kogan foundation okay

1700
01:00:49,430 --> 01:00:48,559
um but this uh organization and

1701
01:00:51,190 --> 01:00:49,440
nonprofit

1702
01:00:53,750 --> 01:00:51,200
is actually composed of a lot of

1703
01:00:56,230 --> 01:00:53,760
military mentors and civilian patriots

1704
01:00:59,190 --> 01:00:56,240
who have stories of resiliency

1705
01:01:00,069 --> 01:00:59,200
and our mission essentially through this

1706
01:01:02,470 --> 01:01:00,079
non-profit

1707
01:01:04,150 --> 01:01:02,480
is to go off to military bases

1708
01:01:06,710 --> 01:01:04,160
throughout the world and talk to

1709
01:01:08,309 --> 01:01:06,720
soldiers airmen air women and marines

1710
01:01:12,549 --> 01:01:08,319
and i've been fortunate enough to be

1711
01:01:15,270 --> 01:01:12,559
on bases in germany england kosovo

1712
01:01:17,670 --> 01:01:15,280
honduras plenty of aces here in the

1713
01:01:19,910 --> 01:01:17,680
states and i was sharing my story

1714
01:01:21,750 --> 01:01:19,920
and i didn't realize the impact it was

1715
01:01:23,670 --> 01:01:21,760
going to have on a lot of individuals

1716
01:01:25,750 --> 01:01:23,680
because

1717
01:01:26,710 --> 01:01:25,760
hearing from them after i do my talks

1718
01:01:28,470 --> 01:01:26,720
with them

1719
01:01:30,309 --> 01:01:28,480
uh through email and telling me how

1720
01:01:33,190 --> 01:01:30,319
appreciative and how

1721
01:01:34,230 --> 01:01:33,200
uh inspire inspired they are to just you

1722
01:01:36,309 --> 01:01:34,240
know

1723
01:01:37,910 --> 01:01:36,319
kind of look past all the negative

1724
01:01:38,630 --> 01:01:37,920
things in their life and focus on

1725
01:01:41,510 --> 01:01:38,640
something

1726
01:01:41,829 --> 01:01:41,520
that's truly good whether it be climbing

1727
01:01:46,549 --> 01:01:41,839
or

1728
01:01:47,510 --> 01:01:46,559
that's been a huge part of my healing

1729
01:01:50,710 --> 01:01:47,520
process as well

1730
01:01:54,150 --> 01:01:50,720
sharing my story and

1731
01:01:55,029 --> 01:01:54,160
they uh started purple art summits under

1732
01:01:58,069 --> 01:01:55,039
the umbrella

1733
01:01:58,710 --> 01:01:58,079
of one team colgan foundation uh because

1734
01:02:01,430 --> 01:01:58,720
of me

1735
01:02:02,630 --> 01:02:01,440
to start getting more uh not necessarily

1736
01:02:04,710 --> 01:02:02,640
provide recipients

1737
01:02:06,390 --> 01:02:04,720
or combat wounded into the mountains but

1738
01:02:08,870 --> 01:02:06,400
veterans and

1739
01:02:10,230 --> 01:02:08,880
essentially uh civilian patriots in the

1740
01:02:11,589 --> 01:02:10,240
mountains to

1741
01:02:13,349 --> 01:02:11,599
achieve something that they never

1742
01:02:16,710 --> 01:02:13,359
thought they could wow

1743
01:02:18,630 --> 01:02:16,720
amazing very cool so a couple quick

1744
01:02:19,990 --> 01:02:18,640
questions before we wrap up on on the

1745
01:02:23,109 --> 01:02:20,000
summit so which

1746
01:02:23,829 --> 01:02:23,119
one was the most difficult most people

1747
01:02:25,829 --> 01:02:23,839
would assume

1748
01:02:27,109 --> 01:02:25,839
everest is that the most difficult or

1749
01:02:30,789 --> 01:02:27,119
not

1750
01:02:35,029 --> 01:02:30,799
it

1751
01:02:38,150 --> 01:02:35,039
mount denali is the hardest

1752
01:02:39,029 --> 01:02:38,160
and i say that because on everest you're

1753
01:02:41,349 --> 01:02:39,039
blessed to have

1754
01:02:42,549 --> 01:02:41,359
a lot of sherpas and porters and yaks

1755
01:02:45,589 --> 01:02:42,559
carry 95

1756
01:02:47,510 --> 01:02:45,599
of your gear unfortunately on denali you

1757
01:02:50,789 --> 01:02:47,520
don't have that luxury

1758
01:02:52,870 --> 01:02:50,799
alaska and the national park service do

1759
01:02:55,109 --> 01:02:52,880
a very good job of trying to keep

1760
01:02:56,549 --> 01:02:55,119
denali as pure as possible so you have

1761
01:02:59,910 --> 01:02:56,559
to carry

1762
01:03:03,670 --> 01:02:59,920
all your own food

1763
01:03:07,029 --> 01:03:03,680
cooking utensils tents your own waste

1764
01:03:09,349 --> 01:03:07,039
your own trash and it adds up i think

1765
01:03:11,750 --> 01:03:09,359
before we departed we averaged out to

1766
01:03:13,109 --> 01:03:11,760
about 120 to 130 pounds we were each

1767
01:03:15,990 --> 01:03:13,119
carrying

1768
01:03:18,230 --> 01:03:16,000
wow whereas when you're climbing everest

1769
01:03:20,870 --> 01:03:18,240
are you carrying anything

1770
01:03:21,349 --> 01:03:20,880
you are carrying the bare minimum you'll

1771
01:03:24,230 --> 01:03:21,359
carry

1772
01:03:26,150 --> 01:03:24,240
a couple of snacks uh extra gloves extra

1773
01:03:26,950 --> 01:03:26,160
puffy jacket just in case you get too

1774
01:03:30,230 --> 01:03:26,960
cold

1775
01:03:32,870 --> 01:03:30,240
and an oxygen container but yeah

1776
01:03:33,270 --> 01:03:32,880
it's uh it's pretty amazing to think

1777
01:03:34,950 --> 01:03:33,280
that

1778
01:03:37,270 --> 01:03:34,960
mount denali is a lot harder than

1779
01:03:38,470 --> 01:03:37,280
everest and i didn't believe it at first

1780
01:03:41,270 --> 01:03:38,480
but it

1781
01:03:43,589 --> 01:03:41,280
it's a true mountain and another kind of

1782
01:03:45,750 --> 01:03:43,599
fun fact is you actually climb

1783
01:03:48,549 --> 01:03:45,760
more vertical feet on denali than you do

1784
01:03:50,309 --> 01:03:48,559
the whole time on everest so it's pretty

1785
01:03:52,789 --> 01:03:50,319
interesting to think about and do you

1786
01:03:56,230 --> 01:03:52,799
bring oxygen to denali or not

1787
01:04:00,309 --> 01:03:56,240
no you don't um the only mountain

1788
01:04:03,750 --> 01:04:00,319
is everest that you'd use oxygen on um

1789
01:04:06,870 --> 01:04:03,760
most people on mountains like denali

1790
01:04:09,910 --> 01:04:06,880
may use a diamox which

1791
01:04:10,950 --> 01:04:09,920
kind of helps with like uh altitude

1792
01:04:13,589 --> 01:04:10,960
sickness sort of thing

1793
01:04:16,069 --> 01:04:13,599
so it helps prevent anything at what

1794
01:04:20,150 --> 01:04:16,079
elevation on everest do you start using

1795
01:04:23,270 --> 01:04:20,160
the oxygen i started at

1796
01:04:26,309 --> 01:04:23,280
just over 20 000 feet actually uh it was

1797
01:04:29,349 --> 01:04:26,319
a little uncommon i started a camp early

1798
01:04:31,190 --> 01:04:29,359
at the discretion of my sherpa who uh

1799
01:04:32,950 --> 01:04:31,200
definitely knows everest more than i do

1800
01:04:33,750 --> 01:04:32,960
so i definitely took his advice and

1801
01:04:36,150 --> 01:04:33,760
started

1802
01:04:37,190 --> 01:04:36,160
using it in one camp earlier and it

1803
01:04:39,270 --> 01:04:37,200
worked out great

1804
01:04:41,750 --> 01:04:39,280
now does that mean you're on it 24 hours

1805
01:04:45,190 --> 01:04:41,760
or just intermittently

1806
01:04:49,750 --> 01:04:45,200
i was on it 24 hours at that time

1807
01:04:51,670 --> 01:04:49,760
some people might be on it

1808
01:04:53,589 --> 01:04:51,680
they'll start usually at the north coal

1809
01:04:54,789 --> 01:04:53,599
i started just below it on the north

1810
01:04:57,910 --> 01:04:54,799
side of everest

1811
01:04:59,109 --> 01:04:57,920
and uh i i was on it 24 hours but at

1812
01:05:02,230 --> 01:04:59,119
that point

1813
01:05:06,069 --> 01:05:02,240
i think we only had two

1814
01:05:06,630 --> 01:05:06,079
three four days where i would need it so

1815
01:05:09,349 --> 01:05:06,640
that was

1816
01:05:10,390 --> 01:05:09,359
i think eight bottles of oxygen i had at

1817
01:05:12,789 --> 01:05:10,400
that time

1818
01:05:13,430 --> 01:05:12,799
i mean you actually sleep with it then

1819
01:05:16,630 --> 01:05:13,440
yep

1820
01:05:19,430 --> 01:05:16,640
yeah yeah it's it was pretty

1821
01:05:20,309 --> 01:05:19,440
eerie starting with it because i did i'd

1822
01:05:22,390 --> 01:05:20,319
never

1823
01:05:24,470 --> 01:05:22,400
wore an oxygen mask like that before and

1824
01:05:27,109 --> 01:05:24,480
did a lot of physical exertion

1825
01:05:28,710 --> 01:05:27,119
and i really started when they put it on

1826
01:05:31,109 --> 01:05:28,720
me i started freaking out a little bit

1827
01:05:33,349 --> 01:05:31,119
like i was feeling really claustrophobic

1828
01:05:34,549 --> 01:05:33,359
and i really took me like 10 to 15

1829
01:05:36,549 --> 01:05:34,559
minutes to kind of settle

1830
01:05:38,950 --> 01:05:36,559
myself down and just kind of get in a

1831
01:05:39,910 --> 01:05:38,960
rhythm but once you get into that rhythm

1832
01:05:45,109 --> 01:05:39,920
it's

1833
01:05:46,470 --> 01:05:45,119
that pure oxygen flow through your body

1834
01:05:49,109 --> 01:05:46,480
and what kind of shape were you in

1835
01:05:50,950 --> 01:05:49,119
before you climbed everest i mean

1836
01:05:52,390 --> 01:05:50,960
i assume you're you're running a lot and

1837
01:05:54,390 --> 01:05:52,400
that that kind of thing

1838
01:05:57,589 --> 01:05:54,400
i actually don't run i can't even

1839
01:05:59,990 --> 01:05:57,599
remember the last time i ran

1840
01:06:01,190 --> 01:06:00,000
i do a lot of like leg and weight

1841
01:06:04,230 --> 01:06:01,200
training exercises

1842
01:06:06,630 --> 01:06:04,240
a lot of strengthening exercises and

1843
01:06:09,029 --> 01:06:06,640
before everest what i would do is i'd

1844
01:06:10,789 --> 01:06:09,039
wear like a 60-pound weighted vest and

1845
01:06:12,950 --> 01:06:10,799
i'd go to planet fitness

1846
01:06:15,029 --> 01:06:12,960
and just crank up the treadmill on the

1847
01:06:18,870 --> 01:06:15,039
highest incline it would go

1848
01:06:21,190 --> 01:06:18,880
and go for at least an hour to just

1849
01:06:22,390 --> 01:06:21,200
trying to get that weight feeling on me

1850
01:06:25,589 --> 01:06:22,400
and just get my

1851
01:06:26,870 --> 01:06:25,599
blood flow and heart rate going um and

1852
01:06:29,109 --> 01:06:26,880
that was pretty much it

1853
01:06:30,870 --> 01:06:29,119
i know a lot of people tend to start

1854
01:06:32,470 --> 01:06:30,880
training at least a year out from

1855
01:06:34,150 --> 01:06:32,480
everest but i only started training

1856
01:06:36,710 --> 01:06:34,160
maybe three months out

1857
01:06:38,630 --> 01:06:36,720
and and what was the last day day like

1858
01:06:41,109 --> 01:06:38,640
where you're you know

1859
01:06:42,230 --> 01:06:41,119
going up the uh final summit what what

1860
01:06:46,549 --> 01:06:42,240
we call that last

1861
01:06:48,710 --> 01:06:46,559
the the hillary step is that kind of

1862
01:06:50,710 --> 01:06:48,720
yeah that's on the south side so when i

1863
01:06:51,029 --> 01:06:50,720
went through the north side you actually

1864
01:06:53,990 --> 01:06:51,039
go

1865
01:06:54,870 --> 01:06:54,000
through um there's three steps then

1866
01:06:59,510 --> 01:06:54,880
they're

1867
01:07:02,069 --> 01:06:59,520
i think 10 feet 20 feet and a 40 feet

1868
01:07:03,190 --> 01:07:02,079
uh basically a rock face that you'd have

1869
01:07:06,789 --> 01:07:03,200
to

1870
01:07:08,950 --> 01:07:06,799
maneuver your way up and once you got

1871
01:07:09,910 --> 01:07:08,960
through those uh three steps you were

1872
01:07:11,589 --> 01:07:09,920
pretty much

1873
01:07:12,950 --> 01:07:11,599
clear to the summit unless weather

1874
01:07:15,589 --> 01:07:12,960
started turning

1875
01:07:16,150 --> 01:07:15,599
so does it ultimately form one line to

1876
01:07:18,870 --> 01:07:16,160
the summit

1877
01:07:19,349 --> 01:07:18,880
the the the north and this yeah gotcha

1878
01:07:21,829 --> 01:07:19,359
yeah

1879
01:07:22,390 --> 01:07:21,839
it was it's pretty wild actually because

1880
01:07:24,390 --> 01:07:22,400
that

1881
01:07:25,990 --> 01:07:24,400
summit push night was something i will

1882
01:07:28,069 --> 01:07:26,000
never ever forget

1883
01:07:30,069 --> 01:07:28,079
um just being that high up in the

1884
01:07:31,670 --> 01:07:30,079
mountains and seeing

1885
01:07:33,670 --> 01:07:31,680
when you're doing your summit push you

1886
01:07:36,470 --> 01:07:33,680
look down and see clouds and

1887
01:07:37,990 --> 01:07:36,480
lightning underneath you uh off in the

1888
01:07:41,270 --> 01:07:38,000
distance was such an

1889
01:07:43,349 --> 01:07:41,280
awesome i mean just being

1890
01:07:44,549 --> 01:07:43,359
as high as you are on your own two feet

1891
01:07:46,309 --> 01:07:44,559
and seeing

1892
01:07:47,829 --> 01:07:46,319
how high you are above the clouds is

1893
01:07:49,750 --> 01:07:47,839
such an awesome feeling

1894
01:07:51,430 --> 01:07:49,760
and then actually there's a point on the

1895
01:07:52,549 --> 01:07:51,440
north side where you can actually see

1896
01:07:54,549 --> 01:07:52,559
headlights from

1897
01:07:56,309 --> 01:07:54,559
the climbers on the south side coming up

1898
01:07:58,549 --> 01:07:56,319
towards the summit so it's such a

1899
01:07:59,670 --> 01:07:58,559
surreal feeling when you get to that

1900
01:08:02,789 --> 01:07:59,680
point

1901
01:08:05,750 --> 01:08:02,799
did you have any scary moments on there

1902
01:08:06,710 --> 01:08:05,760
i did um i watched a lot of horror

1903
01:08:08,309 --> 01:08:06,720
movies

1904
01:08:09,910 --> 01:08:08,319
so when i first started seeing the

1905
01:08:11,829 --> 01:08:09,920
bodies it was kind of like one of those

1906
01:08:14,309 --> 01:08:11,839
things where i'd walk by them

1907
01:08:16,229 --> 01:08:14,319
and i was like oh what if this dude like

1908
01:08:17,749 --> 01:08:16,239
just pops up and grabs me and throws me

1909
01:08:19,749 --> 01:08:17,759
off the mountain

1910
01:08:21,349 --> 01:08:19,759
um but you probably do kind of

1911
01:08:24,709 --> 01:08:21,359
hallucinate a little bit right

1912
01:08:26,950 --> 01:08:24,719
if because yeah yeah you definitely do

1913
01:08:28,630 --> 01:08:26,960
uh you really have to kind of play some

1914
01:08:31,030 --> 01:08:28,640
mind games in your head

1915
01:08:31,990 --> 01:08:31,040
um one of the things i would do is i try

1916
01:08:36,470 --> 01:08:32,000
to beat

1917
01:08:38,870 --> 01:08:36,480
uh my previous steps so i would

1918
01:08:40,870 --> 01:08:38,880
probably walk 10 steps then i'd stop and

1919
01:08:42,709 --> 01:08:40,880
take like 20 seconds to catch my breath

1920
01:08:45,349 --> 01:08:42,719
and then i'd walk 11 steps

1921
01:08:46,870 --> 01:08:45,359
and then i'd do another 10 seconds or 20

1922
01:08:49,349 --> 01:08:46,880
seconds where i'd just stop and

1923
01:08:51,189 --> 01:08:49,359
catch my breath and try and do 12 steps

1924
01:08:53,110 --> 01:08:51,199
so just trying to keep my mind sharp

1925
01:08:55,669 --> 01:08:53,120
like that

1926
01:08:57,430 --> 01:08:55,679
but there was one point on the way down

1927
01:09:00,709 --> 01:08:57,440
from the summit where

1928
01:09:01,669 --> 01:09:00,719
uh i was just incredibly tired at that

1929
01:09:04,070 --> 01:09:01,679
point and i was

1930
01:09:04,950 --> 01:09:04,080
kind of puttsy and i was tripping over

1931
01:09:06,870 --> 01:09:04,960
my own feet

1932
01:09:08,870 --> 01:09:06,880
and thankfully i was clipped in the line

1933
01:09:12,229 --> 01:09:08,880
because that could have been a

1934
01:09:13,829 --> 01:09:12,239
good fall but um nothing nothing too

1935
01:09:17,510 --> 01:09:13,839
crazy and my mom probably shouldn't hear

1936
01:09:21,189 --> 01:09:17,520
that but it's all right

1937
01:09:23,829 --> 01:09:21,199
yeah and um it's a morbid

1938
01:09:26,550 --> 01:09:23,839
morbid question but i mean how many dead

1939
01:09:29,829 --> 01:09:26,560
bodies do you actually pass when you

1940
01:09:33,669 --> 01:09:29,839
climb it yeah uh so i actually counted

1941
01:09:34,070 --> 01:09:33,679
seven um and eerily enough the very

1942
01:09:36,789 --> 01:09:34,080
first

1943
01:09:39,030 --> 01:09:36,799
one i saw was of an individual i met at

1944
01:09:42,950 --> 01:09:39,040
base camp a couple days before

1945
01:09:46,309 --> 01:09:42,960
uh his name was frank and uh he ended up

1946
01:09:47,349 --> 01:09:46,319
passing on his way up during his summit

1947
01:09:49,590 --> 01:09:47,359
attempt

1948
01:09:50,630 --> 01:09:49,600
and uh just kind of walking by and

1949
01:09:53,430 --> 01:09:50,640
seeing that body

1950
01:09:53,829 --> 01:09:53,440
and you saw some familiar clothes uh

1951
01:09:55,590 --> 01:09:53,839
like

1952
01:09:58,149 --> 01:09:55,600
the jacket look familiar the boots look

1953
01:09:59,910 --> 01:09:58,159
very familiar and you're kind of like

1954
01:10:02,070 --> 01:09:59,920
walking by you don't really think too

1955
01:10:05,030 --> 01:10:02,080
much of it but you're like

1956
01:10:07,270 --> 01:10:05,040
wow i think that was frank and then uh

1957
01:10:09,110 --> 01:10:07,280
when i got to my camp i had asked

1958
01:10:10,870 --> 01:10:09,120
one of the other climbers i was with she

1959
01:10:12,790 --> 01:10:10,880
was from poland i was like

1960
01:10:14,870 --> 01:10:12,800
was that frank she was like yeah that

1961
01:10:17,750 --> 01:10:14,880
was frank i was like oh

1962
01:10:19,110 --> 01:10:17,760
i just met this dude two days before um

1963
01:10:21,990 --> 01:10:19,120
but yeah i counted seven

1964
01:10:23,750 --> 01:10:22,000
total and that was including him am and

1965
01:10:25,350 --> 01:10:23,760
they don't bring the bodies down is that

1966
01:10:27,990 --> 01:10:25,360
right

1967
01:10:29,750 --> 01:10:28,000
they don't um the only circumstances

1968
01:10:31,430 --> 01:10:29,760
they will is if a family is really

1969
01:10:34,709 --> 01:10:31,440
willing to pay for it

1970
01:10:38,310 --> 01:10:34,719
um or if it's somebody of importance

1971
01:10:41,110 --> 01:10:38,320
which is sad to say um otherwise

1972
01:10:43,189 --> 01:10:41,120
they'll leave them there they'll push

1973
01:10:45,750 --> 01:10:43,199
them off the path

1974
01:10:50,149 --> 01:10:45,760
and uh sometimes they just roll down the

1975
01:10:52,950 --> 01:10:51,350
that's gotta really make you scratch

1976
01:10:54,709 --> 01:10:52,960
your head as you're going up when you're

1977
01:10:55,430 --> 01:10:54,719
passing someone who you just saw two

1978
01:10:58,390 --> 01:10:55,440
days later you're like

1979
01:10:59,590 --> 01:10:58,400
what the hell am i doing yeah it was

1980
01:11:01,750 --> 01:10:59,600
that moment i started

1981
01:11:02,709 --> 01:11:01,760
uh thinking to myself this is this is

1982
01:11:07,430 --> 01:11:02,719
real this is

1983
01:11:11,830 --> 01:11:09,430
well congratulations my friend you did

1984
01:11:13,669 --> 01:11:11,840
it and we did it on our third attempt

1985
01:11:15,830 --> 01:11:13,679
for this interview

1986
01:11:17,270 --> 01:11:15,840
but it was it was well it was well worth

1987
01:11:17,830 --> 01:11:17,280
it i think the listeners are going to

1988
01:11:20,229 --> 01:11:17,840
love it i

1989
01:11:21,110 --> 01:11:20,239
i enjoyed it tell me real quick what do

1990
01:11:23,990 --> 01:11:21,120
you want to kind of

1991
01:11:25,669 --> 01:11:24,000
promote or have people go check out oh

1992
01:11:28,070 --> 01:11:25,679
wow that's a great question

1993
01:11:29,030 --> 01:11:28,080
so i'm just kind of kind of go through

1994
01:11:30,470 --> 01:11:29,040
one of my plans

1995
01:11:32,229 --> 01:11:30,480
or a couple of my plans in the near

1996
01:11:33,910 --> 01:11:32,239
future here i'm working on a book

1997
01:11:35,910 --> 01:11:33,920
uh i've actually started it over a year

1998
01:11:40,229 --> 01:11:35,920
and a half ago and i've only got

1999
01:11:41,750 --> 01:11:40,239
maybe 60 pages done if that

2000
01:11:43,270 --> 01:11:41,760
so hopefully the next year and a half

2001
01:11:45,030 --> 01:11:43,280
i'll have that done you certainly have

2002
01:11:47,470 --> 01:11:45,040
enough stories for it

2003
01:11:48,630 --> 01:11:47,480
i do i do it's a going to be an

2004
01:11:51,990 --> 01:11:48,640
inspirational

2005
01:11:54,950 --> 01:11:52,000
bio biography book but

2006
01:11:55,430 --> 01:11:54,960
also i'm going to take the next year or

2007
01:11:57,590 --> 01:11:55,440
two

2008
01:11:59,510 --> 01:11:57,600
off from any sorts of adventures

2009
01:12:01,510 --> 01:11:59,520
especially big mountain climbing i think

2010
01:12:03,189 --> 01:12:01,520
those days are behind me

2011
01:12:05,590 --> 01:12:03,199
but i had gotten the green light from my

2012
01:12:08,229 --> 01:12:05,600
wife to try and get sponsorship to

2013
01:12:10,470 --> 01:12:08,239
ski to the south pole to work on the

2014
01:12:11,669 --> 01:12:10,480
explorers grand slam which is the seven

2015
01:12:14,149 --> 01:12:11,679
summits and then

2016
01:12:15,510 --> 01:12:14,159
uh getting to both the north and south

2017
01:12:18,149 --> 01:12:15,520
pole

2018
01:12:19,110 --> 01:12:18,159
but other than that i really want to try

2019
01:12:20,630 --> 01:12:19,120
and promote

2020
01:12:23,110 --> 01:12:20,640
the non-profit i'm a volunteer and

2021
01:12:25,830 --> 01:12:23,120
mentor for in purple heart summits

2022
01:12:26,470 --> 01:12:25,840
under the one team kogan foundation

2023
01:12:31,510 --> 01:12:26,480
umbrella

2024
01:12:35,189 --> 01:12:31,520
which is at www.oneteamcf.org

2025
01:12:37,750 --> 01:12:35,199
and our goal is to have the first female

2026
01:12:40,470 --> 01:12:37,760
per part recipient to get to the summit

2027
01:12:42,149 --> 01:12:40,480
and uh hopefully in the next couple

2028
01:12:42,950 --> 01:12:42,159
years we're gonna raise enough money to

2029
01:12:45,189 --> 01:12:42,960
get her there

2030
01:12:48,149 --> 01:12:45,199
whoever she may be so if she's listening

2031
01:12:49,910 --> 01:12:48,159
to this please feel free to reach out

2032
01:12:51,830 --> 01:12:49,920
thank you again to benjamin breckheimer

2033
01:12:53,910 --> 01:12:51,840
you can check out him and all the great

2034
01:12:55,750 --> 01:12:53,920
work he is doing on his website

2035
01:12:57,350 --> 01:12:55,760
just google benjamin breckheimer and

2036
01:12:59,510 --> 01:12:57,360
you'll see his

2037
01:13:00,950 --> 01:12:59,520
website thank you to our producer

2038
01:13:02,310 --> 01:13:00,960
michael parker thank you all for

2039
01:13:06,090 --> 01:13:02,320
listening we'll be back soon with

2040
01:13:10,790 --> 01:13:06,100
another episode of the hidden truth show

2041
01:13:13,990 --> 01:13:12,229
thank you for listening to the truth

2042
01:13:17,510 --> 01:13:14,000
show with jim breslow

2043
01:13:19,750 --> 01:13:17,520
you can find us at hiddentruthshow.com

2044
01:13:20,550 --> 01:13:19,760
follow us on facebook twitter and

2045
01:13:23,189 --> 01:13:20,560
instagram

2046
01:13:25,510 --> 01:13:23,199
that hit the truth show join us again

2047
01:13:26,550 --> 01:13:25,520
next week for another episode of hidden

2048
01:13:32,840 --> 01:13:26,560
truth show